


Day 6. Ushijima Wakatoshi/Sugawara Koushi – Bonds (Telepathic or Empathic)

by Falka_tyan



Series: Kinktober 2017 [6]
Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - Future, Alternate Universe - Space, Domestic Fluff, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Empathic Bonds, First Time, Future Fic, Getting Together, Getting to Know Each Other, Kinktober, Kinktober 2017, Light BDSM, Light Dom/sub, Living on A Satellite, M/M, Nipple Clamps, Nipple Play, Orgasm Delay/Denial, Pining, Rare Pairings, Spanking, Strangers to Lovers, Unrequited Love, Vibrators
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-18
Updated: 2018-01-14
Packaged: 2019-01-19 07:57:06
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 25,618
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12406278
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Falka_tyan/pseuds/Falka_tyan
Summary: Ushijima Wakatoshi lives on a satellite where people get bonded with each other according to the data of a system.When he meets the person he is going to bond with, Wakatoshi doesn't know a thing about them.Will they be able to get used to each other?Or: Sugawara Koushi suffers from an unrequited crush, and Wakatoshi is dense, but caring.





	1. A Miracle

**Author's Note:**

> Hey hey hey!
> 
> It's time for Day 6 of my Kinktober!  
> This time it's a future AU. This world has emerged from the depths of my unconscious unexpectedly for myself.  
> But here we go - a utopic fic.
> 
> The pairing has been chosen randomly, again.  
> Rare pair lovers, I'm here for you)))
> 
> P.S. This escalated to a multi-chapter fic! Yay!  
> UshiSuga - now with porn in it!  
> For those who don't need porn in their lives - the first chapter is Teen and Up.

It happens one sunny day in January. Wakatoshi is walking down one of the shopping streets, recalling the items he needs for organizing a new flowerbed.

The weather is nice, as it always is under the Dome of the Yukiko-423 satellite, thanks to the bots which keep the temperature in the live areas at a comfortable level, maintain the air pressure and control the lighting system. Sometimes, it rains a little, but rarely and only after a proper warning. The archives say that on Earth it could be _snowing_ in January. There have been a lot of odd forms of precipitation on the old Earth.

Wakatoshi knows what snow is, he’s seen it enough times in the freezers and on the surface of the satellite outside the Dome (though the snow there doesn’t consist of water molecules like it has had on Earth). Nonetheless, the idea of snowflakes falling down from the sky seems ridiculous to Wakatoshi. But when it comes to vocabulary, natural phenomena have been a constant source of inspiration for people of old times. For example, in some ancient terrestrial language, there has been a proverb, sounding “like a heap of snow has dropped on the head”, which meant “sudden, completely unexpected”. Wakatoshi couldn’t find a better description of his bonding with Sugawara Koushi than that.

 

 

Their bonding doesn’t happen slowly or feel harmonious like some of his bonded colleagues have described it. Not at all. The whole process takes less than a second. Suddenly, Wakatoshi feels hot all over, and the whole open surface of his skin emits a bright magenta glow, which surges up like a bow of light, meeting a similar bow, only in orange, somewhere above Wakatoshi’s head. As soon as the two strings of light touch, they mix and fade in the atmosphere, having completed the data transfer.

One second he is just Ushijima Wakatoshi, the next second he is a half of a bond. Foreign feelings and emotions come crashing down on him. The other half of the bond is panicking, and also feels amusement, anger, relief, and desperation; all at once. Wakatoshi wonders for the first time (but not for the last), just how rich the emotional range of his bonded is, and how plain his own appears in comparison.

As soon as the initial shock fades, Wakatoshi starts moving towards the person he is now meant to spend his whole life with. He is tingling with excitement, and feels a little stupid because of it. He knows that the process of bonding is pure science; that the glow and everything else have been the results of the work of the nanites in his body; that the nanites have reacted the way they did because the Bonds Control System (the BCS) has found a suitable partner for Wakatoshi in a one kilometre range; that nano-bonding is just another adjustment made in the human body to allow successful survival in space. But Wakatoshi’s old-fashioned brain can’t supply him with a better word to describe the sensation of forming an empathic connection with another human than “a miracle”.

Wakatoshi moves through the crowd, following his new link. He experiences so many different feelings during the time it takes him to make a single step that he feels dizzy from all the new information his brain collects.

And then Wakatoshi sees _him_. He instantly knows that this silver-haired boy with a mole under his left eye is his new life partner. The boy smiles at him a warm, helpless smile, and Wakatoshi gives a small smile of his own as well. Then, out of the blue, it seems to Wakatoshi that his chest feels tight, and his heart aches, and there’s not enough oxygen in the atmosphere. He understands instantly that these are the grey-haired boy’s emotions, because Wakatoshi himself is still calm, though a little exhilarated. But the angelic boy still _smiles_ pleasantly, walking towards Wakatoshi. This is how Wakatoshi learns how much a human smile can conceal (Satori has teased him for a week after Wakatoshi has told him about this revelation), and this is how his and his bonded’s life together begins.

Wakatoshi knows that finding a suitable person for a life-time bond is like winning a lottery. There are many requirements, but one is really tough to meet: to form a connection, two persons should be not more than one kilometer away from each other, otherwise, the BCS won’t be able to proceed all the data correctly and structure the bond. During the first 17 years of citizens’ life, the BCS evaluates their features and predicts what qualities their partner might need to form a best possible combination. The system is on high alert constantly, watching people, analyzing the opportunities of a stable connection, matching couples.

The bonding can happen during following three phases: from 18 to 20 (persons of the best choice), from 21 to 23 (the second best choice) and from 24 to 26 (the third best choice, as silly as it sounds). If you bond with a person at the age between 18 and 20, then, according to the BCS-data, it is a nearly perfect fit for you. You are included in the luckiest 15% of the satellite’s population. If you meet your bonded at the age between 21 and 23, then it’s also incredible. 40% of Yukiko-423 citizens have been as lucky as you. If you form a bond at the age between 24 and 26, it’s a sign of luck too, since it’s the last chance to form a nano-connection which will last your lifetime. Though you need to know that you’re not perfect for each other, just…really good. 20% of the Dome’s inhabitants are in the same situation as you. It leaves 25% of Yukiko-423 citizens. The members of this group will never bond. It has been proven impossible to form a healthy bond between two people older than 26 years old. At that age, the weight of personal experience and formed habits becomes more influential than the nanites in the person’s body. The “unhappy” representatives of the last 25% of the population are allowed to marry, but only with other unbonded people older than 26 years old.

That’s how it works. To Wakatoshi, the system sounds simple and good structured. He knows what the bonds have initially been for: they’ve been invented as a tool of preventing abusive marriages which have been a bane of early satellite colonies. With its small space and limited resources, people on a satellite needed to be able to share without fighting. Taking care of their closest persons also proved to be of utmost importance.

In order to survive, the humans have perfected the procedure of in vitro fertilization (to the extent when women don’t have to bear a child and give birth anymore) and invented the system of nano-bonds. Bonded persons can feel each other’s emotions, which makes the communication in the couple easier. There are other special aspects of living in a bond, like the impossibility of physically hurting your bonded on your own volition or cheating on him. The nano-wiring prevents such impulses in their core.

All in all, it is a unique system which has been ensuring the survival of the human population among stars for more than a century. But (there is always a _but_ ) it has been made without paying consideration to such thing as love. The logic of the bond-inventors says, you don’t need to be in love to survive. You need to stay calm, have the emotional support from a person next to you and never act aggressively towards your partner.

These explanations always seemed clear and self-evident to Wakatoshi. They’ve been _enough_. Before he has bonded himself, that was.

 

 

Wakatoshi's bonded is a smart, polite young man, who works close to the surface of the Dome, ensuring its safety from the space radiation. It's a reputable job and a risky one at that. Wakatoshi appreciates it. He actually thinks that he's lucked out by bonding with Sugawara Koushi (the man insists on calling him Suga, though Wakatoshi can't yet bring himself to do so). Sugawara has a lithe, trained body, soft silver hair, which reminds Wakatoshi of the frost-dew outside the Dome, and a round, smiley face. His copper eyes are bright with intelligence and also kind. Wakatoshi respects him a lot.

The only dark cloud in Wakatoshi’s new life as a bonded person is that Sugawara doesn't feel happy since day one. Whether it is because of their new-formed bond, or Sugawara has other reasons to be upset, he doesn't say it out loud and pretends to be _fine_. The problem is that he _is not_. Not at all, if you ask Wakatoshi. Something is eating Sugawara from the inside; Wakatoshi can say that much due to their established connection.

Wakatoshi can feel Sugawara's sadness any time of day. The space under the Dome is just wide enough so that all bonded pairs can feel each other while inside. But nonetheless, he doesn't pry. Wakatoshi wouldn't appreciate someone disrespecting his own personal boundaries, that's why he tries to show the same level of respect to the others.

Honestly, Wakatoshi would have preferred bonds being mental, allowing to share thoughts, not emotions and feelings. It is not possible to generate mental bonds technically yet, though. It's a pity, since an empathic bond doesn’t seem to be of much use in the repetitive pattern of Wakatoshi’s safe daily life. More of a pain in the ass.

Sugawara and he are living together for two months now. The satellite’s administration has granted them with a flat on the occasion of their bonding. It's more convenient than the dormitory for the unbonded agricultural workers where Wakatoshi has stayed previously: there’s more privacy and less noise. Wakatoshi misses his roommates though. Which is unexpected, considering how loud and obnoxious Satori can be.

The flat has only one bedroom, and Sugawara has insisted he'll stay in the living room on the very first day. Wakatoshi has agreed, but it’s been a mistake on his part. Their agreement appears to be inconvenient for Wakatoshi, because his bonded is a light sleeper and wakes up later than Wakatoshi on working days. Wakatoshi takes the situation as a challenge and soon enough prides himself at not waking his new flatmate while he gets ready for work. His current record is five days in a row. Thankfully, their kitchen has a separate door, as every room under the Dome has, and he can cook whatever he wants in the morning without bothering Sugawara with the noise.

Sugawara never eats breakfast. It's unhealthy. After spending a month together Wakatoshi couldn't witness it anymore. When he offers Sugawara to take a home-made bento to work, first he feels how surprise and confusion flare through their bond. But then, and it's been the first time since their fateful meeting at the shopping mall, Wakatoshi senses joy from Sugawara, a warm emotion connected with Wakatoshi. His bonded is feeling more content with life because of Wakatoshi, and, strangely, it fills Wakatoshi's chest with warmth. He makes making bentos for Sugawara a part of his morning routine since then and never regrets it. Early morning is the only time of day when Sugawara’s smile isn’t a shield for protecting his real emotions, but a mirror of Sugawara’s sincere gratitude towards Wakatoshi.

Sugawara rarely comes home late on the workdays. Sugawara comes home early on weekends too, although he usually goes out with his friends from college or school on holidays. His absence during the day on weekends allows Wakatoshi to invite Satori over. Satori never fails to bring the air of carelessness and perpetual curiosity with him. He talks, and talks, and talks, greedy for Wakatoshi's attention, and it's fairly obvious, how much Satori misses Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi’s red-haired friend is lonely without him. Wakatoshi wonders whether Satori will bond too; whether it could make him feel not alone. He still has time until he turns 27. They are only 24, after all.

It's OK that his bonded spends his free time the way he wants. Anyway, Wakatoshi finds himself contemplating variants of spending evenings and weekends _with Sugawara_ more often with every passing week. They are meant to live their whole lives together, don't they need to learn to know each other more? But Wakatoshi doesn't push. Boundaries and all.

Until one fateful evening comes.

 

The morning has started as usual. Sugawara wished him to have a good day and was gone. The usual sad background has been present in his emotional landscape, as every other day. Wakatoshi doesn’t pay a lot of attention to this for now, waiting until his bonded grows to trust him to learn more.

This time though, by the end of the day the usual sadness gives space to...pain. Wakatoshi can't shake off the heavy feelings, which are evidently piercing his bonded's soul this very moment. He can't concentrate on his reading, he can't start cleaning up the flat, and he can't tend to his mini-garden on the balcony.

Speaking of which… Sugawara has mentioned that he likes the anthurium, by the way.

The silver-haired boy comes to the balcony when he thinks Wakatoshi doesn't see and stands there, staring at the sky or talking to the flowers. Although Wakatoshi considers this area of the flat _his_ , he doesn't mind sharing, if it's his bonded. Previously, Wakatoshi has thought he was the only person to talk to flowers among his acquaintances, and Satori has used to tease him about it mercilessly. This is why Wakatoshi doesn't let anyone see this side of himself (Satori is the only exception), and never disturbs Sugawara when the latter wanders to the balcony.

While Wakatoshi thinks about Sugawara and his aroids collection, the pain being transmitted through the bond doesn't subside. Sugawara must be very upset, and Wakatoshi decides to call him. Maybe, he needs something? But Sugawara doesn't answer his comm. Wakatoshi starts to worry. Then he realizes, that he doesn't have any comm IDs of Sugawara’s colleagues, or friends. He can feel the place where his bonded is, but very uncertainly. Finding him will take hours.

When Wakatoshi thinks that staying away he may let something ugly happen to Sugawara, he feels almost desperate. He has grown to like his flatmate, and though they don’t really get each other, he feels responsible for Sugawara’s well-being. He doesn’t know how, but Wakatoshi can tell that it’s not the nano-bond deciding for him, but his own emotion.

When Wakatoshi is looking hastily through the lists of surface workers in an attempt to find some colleague of Sugawara's who may know his whereabouts, the entrance door opens and Sugawara gracelessly stumbles inside. He is _drunk_.

Through all his worry and Sugawara’s emotional turmoil, still filling Wakatoshi’s senses with a white noise, Wakatoshi has been unable to tell that Sugawara was on his way home. Wakatoshi is not pleased with himself for being so inattentive; the less is he pleased with his bonded, who could’ve acted like an adult person should. But something is decidedly _wrong_.

Wakatoshi watches with a surreal feeling how his uptight, neat partner sits heavily on his butt on the cold corridor floor and leans with his back on the entrance door. Sugawara looks miserable. The worst thing is the smile he tries to hold on his face. Bitten lips, red-rimmed eyes, tousled hair - and this thin, suffering smile. Wakatoshi feels a strong wave of pity filling his soul. He isn't angry with his bonded anymore; all he wants is to help him out of his misery. But when he tries to address Sugawara, to coax him to move to the bathroom, to offer him water, all he gets are strings of mumbled curses, sobbing laughs and annoyed outcries after Wakatoshi’s hand has been batted away for umpteenth time. The struggling continues for several minutes, until suddenly Sugawara goes silent, scoots closer to the door, tips his head up and meets Wakatoshi's gaze with a look of pure hatred. The look itself makes Wakatoshi feel haunted. When the same venomous hatred flows into the bond, Wakatoshi feels horrified by the sheer intensity of the feeling. And to know that this is what his bonded feels towards him...

Wakatoshi can't stand the venom a second longer, so he closes their bond. He hasn't ever tried it before; there’s been no need. It isn't scientifically possible to hold the nano-bond closed for more than an hour, but Wakatoshi needs any rest he can get now. As soon as the link is disconnected, Wakatoshi feels an immediate relief, albeit paired with a feeling of hollowness. The last one is new, and surprising. Wakatoshi has been unaware that he's grown so used to feeling his partner all the time.

But what surprises him even more, is the reaction Sugawara gives him after the connection between them slips closed. As soon as Sugawara comprehends what has happened, what Wakatoshi has done, his eyes grow wide with horror and he makes an abortive move forward, as if trying to touch Wakatoshi, to pull him closer. Of course, in the state he is, Sugawara doesn't reach his goal and falls on his knees instead. There he stays, practically on all fours, one of his hands stretched towards Wakatoshi, his gaze pained and pleading.

"Please, Ushijima, don't close up yourself from me", Sugawara begs, desperate. "I won't ever come home drunk and ignore your comm calls. I'll be better for you, just please..."

Wakatoshi can't grasp the meaning of Sugawara's words at first, so untypical his behaviour is. Wakatoshi blinks at his silver-haired partner in confusion, not knowing how to respond. His bonded takes his reaction as a sign of refusal, lowers his outstretched hand and slumps on the floor in a limbless pile. He hugs himself and starts quivering. Wakatoshi can hear him mumbling something incoherent. When he moves closer, he can distinguish the words:

"What a disgrace I am, what a useless piece of meat... If even my bonded doesn't want to deal with me anymore... What do I do now, what do I do? No one wants me..." And he starts chanting the last phrase.

Stupidly, but now Wakatoshi can finally guess what Sugawara has been asking for. Only after his bonded has had to suffer a complete meltdown just in front of Wakatoshi.

Wakatoshi opens the bond immediately, and his conscience almost drowns in the sea of despair Sugawara creates. The hatred is gone though, and Wakatoshi learns that he would gladly endure this and any other maelstrom of emotions from Sugawara Koushi for an indefinite amount of time if it won't include hatred towards Wakatoshi ever again.

Wakatoshi doesn't hesitate anymore. His bonded can't take care of himself in this state if mind, so it falls upon Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi doesn't mind. He lifts Sugawara from the floor, hugs him to his chest and brings him to the bedroom. He has a fleeting doubt whether he has to bring Sugawara to his own futon in the living room, but quickly dismisses the idea. He needs to ensure his bonded is safe, doesn't he? The best way is to spend the night in one room, Wakatoshi tells himself.

Wakatoshi gingerly lays his bonded on the bed, quickly and efficiently undresses him, ignoring the reek of alcohol and the boy's weak protests. (Why is alcohol still legal on the satellites, even if once in three months? That doesn't make any sense.) When Sugawara is in his underwear only, Wakatoshi tucks him under the cover and gives a bottle of water to drink from. Luckily, he keeps a spare one on his bedside table. When Wakatoshi thinks his bonded is comfortable and almost stable, he stands up to leave. He needs to get some things ready for tomorrow (it’s Monday), and he plans to get another futon to sleep on the bedroom floor, when...

...A hand clutches his shirt in a death grip. "Please, don't go", whispers Sugawara in a pleading tone. Wakatoshi almost groans aloud at how out of place this tone feels from Sugawara Koushi of all people. He stops, turns back and takes a seat on the edge on the bed, so that his bonded can touch him, if he wants, but not too close so that he doesn’t scare him off.

They spend some time in silence after that. Sugawara's hands are folded in his lap and his gaze is turned down. Wakatoshi can't help but wonder what has made his proud partner behave like that. Begging has been so out of place that Wakatoshi still feels overwhelmed. Sugawara has never so much as asked Wakatoshi for help, not even once. He's always made sure to be self-sufficient, to be independent. Wakatoshi has always admired that about him. The bond between them informs Wakatoshi that his bonded mostly feels exhaustion and quiet resignation right now. They need to talk, but more than that, Sugawara needs to sleep.

He calls him by his family name once, twice. No reaction. "Suga" gets no response as well. Then Wakatoshi tries his bonded's given name (it feels strangely comfortable on his tongue):

"Koushi".

It gets a more vivid reaction than Wakatoshi could have predicted. Teary copper eyes look at Wakatoshi, and then he is being dragged further on the bed, and held close, and hugged with an unexpected amount of power. Clumsily, Wakatoshi hugs back. There are also words, tons of words muttered into Wakatoshi’s chest where his bonded hides his wet face; it is more than Sugawara (Koushi?) has ever said to him in one go before.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, Wakatoshi. You haven't done anything wrong. (a sob) I'm the one at fault here. I'm such a disgrace. (a shuddering breath) I got used to your emotional presence in my life so quickly. I-I took it all for granted. (a little hiccup) You've been like a rock to hold on, solid and trustworthy, somewhere in the back of my mind. You've been nothing but supportive of me all this time. (A deep sigh) And how do I repay you? I use you to spill my negative emotions out, make you feel all my misery..."

Wakatoshi has enough of Koushi's self-deprecation by now. He gently shushes him and asks tentatively:

"Does it mean you don't hate me?"

It's selfish, but he needs to hear a confirmation, otherwise he won't be able to sleep tonight. Koushi lifts his head to look Wakatoshi in the eye. He is still a wreck, but his gaze is gaining its usual confidence back.

"No, I don't," he says quietly, but surely, and Wakatoshi's soul feels so much lighter this same instant. Then Koushi adds:

"Thank you".

Wakatoshi waits for more words, but they don't come. Koushi is still hurting inside, though. Wakatoshi won't pry. Today, that is. Whatever has happened to Koushi, he needs to know. He doesn't want to see his bonded reduced to a shivering, begging mess ever again. That's why they need to discuss it openly; or so he has been taught in practical psychology courses in his first college semester.

Wakatoshi makes his voice firm, but not too stern when he says: "Tomorrow, we wake up an hour earlier and you tell me what has happened to you before we go to work". Koushi tries to interrupt, but Wakatoshi won't have any of that. "No arguing. If we were still at the dorms and I still worked as the dorm manager, I would have to punish you for your improper behaviour. Now I only want you to talk to me honestly". His bonded is silent, and Wakatoshi adds, a little milder: "OK?"

"Yes, sir," answers Koushi stiffly, not looking at him anymore. It may be a mechanical response from his training time; the surface workers are close to the military in part of discipline, so it's only fitting. From the bond, Wakatoshi can say that his bonded feels ashamed of the situation, of his own attitude. But, aside of that, he is not hurting fiercely anymore, so it's a good start. Beyond that, shame made most of the misbehaving dorm occupants behave, so it's not a bad thing too.

Wakatoshi lowers Koushi gently on the pillow and announces in a tone which doesn't allow arguments:

"I'll prepare everything for tomorrow morning, and you will lie here and wait for me. Understand?"

"Yes, sir," answers Koushi and sniffles, hugging the blanket to his chest.

"Good boy," praises Wakatoshi, because his first mother has always told him that when he listened well. By the way... He and Satori haven't been to their childhood home for a while; they may as well pay a visit soon. Their mothers' current batch of kids is troublesome, and they could use some support.

What surprises Wakatoshi, is that he feels a pang of desire from Koushi he can't quite place when he says his last sentence.

Wakatoshi returns to bed as quickly as he can and lies down beside Koushi. He pets his bonded on the head, saying approvingly: "Thank you". This earns him a confused: "For what?" It is easy to explain, since his second mother has always explained it like that.

"For obeying my command. Good behaviour deserves praise".

He can say Koushi wants to contradict, wants to shrug it off, but he reins himself and answers sincerely:

"Thank you, sir".

Wakatoshi hasn’t ever insisted on addressing him like that, but it sounds nice coming from Koushi. They get comfortable under the covers, and Koushi rests his head on Wakatoshi's chest. Wakatoshi wonders whether sleeping with his bonded in one bed will be as disastrous as with Satori, and prepares for the worst. 

 

"Good night, Wakatoshi," whispers Koushi and is out like a light. Wakatoshi whispers back: "Good night, Koushi," nevertheless, and feels more content and warm than ever before in his life.

 

 

The next morning Wakatoshi wakes up first and is treated to the image of sleeping Koushi. His bonded's silver hair is messy, his features are heavy with sleep, and he clutches at Wakatoshi's T-shirt like it's a lifeline. During the night, Koushi hasn't disturbed Wakatoshi at all. Luckily, he is nothing like Satori and hasn't kicked or moved restlessly in his sleep, as if trying to drop Wakatoshi from the bed. Wakatoshi thinks he could get used to sleeping together with his bonded. 

He quietly slips out of bed, earning a displeased frown on Koushi's face. There is still time before the alarm goes off, and Wakatoshi makes breakfast, showers and starts tending to his mini cactus garden on the kitchen window sill. He loses track of time as it is often the case when he is gardening. That is why he is startled by Koushi's light footsteps, when the latter comes into the kitchen. As Wakatoshi turns to him, Koushi stretches his back and yawns loudly.

"It's too early to function, Wakatoshi!" complains Koushi. "Do we really need to talk or I may sleep for another 40 minutes longer?" His bonded's voice is whiny, the way Wakatoshi hasn't ever heard it before. The tone is mildly annoying. But in their empathic connection, there is only a slight trace left of loneliness and sadness that have tortured the silver-haired boy the whole time they’ve spent together. Wakatoshi feels so relieved that he can hardly hide the amusement in his voice when he answers:

"Good morning to you too, Koushi. No, you may not return to bed. The breakfast is ready, by the way".

Koushi puffs childishly and slumps down on the nearest chair.

"Go shower first," Wakatoshi adds sternly, trying to appear strict. It usually makes Satori move faster when the redhead has a tantrum, maybe it will be useful here as well.

"Yes, sir!" exclaims Koushi with an unhealthy amount of enthusiasm (he even snaps a salute), but still, he makes a show of slouching away with a pout, like an overgrown toddler. What an artist.

Wakatoshi hasn't ever seen his bonded in a joking or teasing mood around him. It is such a huge step forward compared to what they've had just yesterday, even the atmosphere in their flat has changed drastically. It makes Wakatoshi feel...happy?

When Koushi returns from the shower, he looks fresh and rosy. He also wears a huge smile. Wakatoshi hasn’t ever seen Koushi smile like that. The thought that this marvellous, shining smile is just for Wakatoshi, makes him unexpectedly warm and tingly on the inside. Satori has once mentioned something about butterflies in the stomach when talking about falling in love; that must be it, supposes Wakatoshi. Koushi is so beautiful when he is joyful and careless, and Wakatoshi wants him to stay this way every single day from now on.

 

 

It’s the first time they have breakfast together. Koushi always runs late in the morning, so there wasn’t any chance. They eat their meals, and, without prompting from Wakatoshi’s side, Koushi starts narrating: about his childhood, about his best friend who grew up in the same bunch as Koushi, about Koushi developing a painfully persistent crush on his best friend. The crush has survived Koushi's adolescence, his college years (while studying similar professions at the same university as his friend at that), his first years of surface worker training and the start of his career.

If you look closely, the Dome is actually a sphere, not a hemisphere, and the underground areas need maintenance as much as the upper part does. Koushi's best friend starts working in the subterranean part of the Dome at the same time as Koushi himself begins tending to its transparent part. His friend has to travel to the lowest levels of the underground facilities and stay there for a day-and-night shift every time. Koushi and his friend start to see each other less and less due to his friend's specific workplace. It makes the hopelessness of Koushi's love struggles pathetically obvious. Koushi misses his best friend, can't stop dreaming of him, can’t get him out of his head no matter how hard he tries. To top it all, the inattention to Koushi’s feelings from the object of his crush makes Koushi feel bitter and unlovable. This is how Koushi’s life goes when he meets his future bonded, Wakatoshi.

Everything changes in mere seconds.

Not an hour passes by, and Koushi finds himself in a relationship with a stranger, who doesn't know a thing about Koushi, but has access to his deepest feelings from now on. It is unfair; Koushi has always found the concept of bonding inhuman. He’s feared the possibility of getting bonded one day, hoped it won’t happen to him; and at the same time, Koushi has secretly waited for it as a chance to get rid of his old and unrequited crush.

This man, his bonded, appears cold and distant, but thanks to the bond, Koushi instantly learns, that this is not true. Koushi learns that Wakatoshi deeply cares about everything that is close to him or becomes his responsibility: his plants, his friends, his mothers and his childhood home. And now, since Koushi has also become Wakatoshi’s responsibility, Koushi starts receiving all the care Wakatoshi can give him. Koushi never lets his annoyance at the situation come to the surface. He stays polite, though a little distant. If Wakatoshi was just his flatmate, he would be much friendlier. But the way it is, Koushi has no other choice as to get old in the company of this man, who may have a million of different virtues; but nothing can make Wakatoshi _the one_. Thankfully, human interaction is not one of Wakatoshi’s strong sides. He lets Koushi live his life without interfering, accepts as a given that Koushi holds his distance and doesn’t feel hurt or lonely because of it. Their arrangement is…convenient, to say the least. Koushi is beginning to think, that he has lucked out by bonding with Wakatoshi.

They continue living as respectful neighbours, when Wakatoshi makes him bento for the first time. Koushi is so stunned, that he can’t decline. He receives a bento every morning from now on. Koushi feels weak, but he can’t stop himself from becoming attached. He and Wakatoshi don’t grow close or anything, but their life together starts feeling _nice_.

 

The love for his childhood best friend doesn’t leave Koushi, though. He quenches it (tries to), but to no avail. Koushi lives in his own limbo until the day when it all goes down the hill. His friend and he meet on their weekend, have a nice sparring in the gym, then sit in a nearby café and seep smoothies, having a good quality time together. Koushi’s friend asks about Koushi’s bonded. Who he is, how does it feel from Koushi’s perspective, does Koushi like his new life. The simple questions hurt more than Koushi could have expected. During this conversation, Koushi realises fully, invariably, that yes, he is bonded, that this is not a prank or a dream. There is no turning back. That he won’t be able to spend his life with the man he has loved all his grown-up life. That, however, he lies to himself and pretends that Wakatoshi is just a stranger, just like on the day they’ve met, that’s not true. _Koushi is bonded_ , and it’s not in his power to change that fact.

This is why after they part ways with his friend Koushi uses his pass to the bar and gets drunk. His friend has shown concern for him, but Koushi has waived him off with his usual playful teasing. What did his friend think he could hear from Koushi? _“Oh hello, pretty boy, I’ve been in love with you since I’ve been 13, and now I am 24, and bonded, and I’ve just realized that the person I am bonded to is not you, and it tears my soul apart???!”_ Koushi is tired of adulting; he drinks his ass off, ignores Wakatoshi’s calls and Wakatoshi’s worry that he can sense through their connection; gets kicked out of the bar and comes home shit-faced, angry and pathetic.

 

The rest of the story is known to both of them. Wakatoshi prepares to tell Koushi how he has been frantically searching numbers of Koushi’s colleagues, sick from worry, and how displeased with his bonded he has been, but then he manages to notice the time and…

It is the first time in four years when Wakatoshi is late for work. It’s only 5 minutes, but his colleagues do their best to annoy Wakatoshi with their teasing till the end of his workday. When Wakatoshi is ready to go home, his senior manager confronts him in the hall. He is a nice, quiet man whom Wakatoshi has grown to respect. His senior asks what has caused Wakatoshi coming late to work. He seems to be positively bothered by this strange (for Wakatoshi) occurrence; maybe, he thinks that something is wrong?

“There’s nothing to worry about; I’ve been having an important talk with my bonded this morning and didn’t want to interrupt it, that’s all,” assures him Wakatoshi.

His colleague looks at him with a newfound sense of respect.

 

 

 

A month later, Wakatoshi and his bonded are walking a busy street in downtown, when they hear a loud yell of “Suga-a!” and a sturdy man with brown hair and an easy smile jogs to them.

Koushi suddenly feels horror, then guilt, then joy, then shame, then insecurity. This palette of feelings flares through the bond, making Wakatoshi apprehensive.

“I’ve been avoiding him since the evening when I’ve got drunk,” whispers Koushi, and Wakatoshi doesn’t need any other hints.

“Want me to tell him to mind his own business?” he offers in all seriousness.

Koushi looks up at him incredulously, and the tension leaves Koushi’s body all at once. He laughs sincerely, slams his palm on Wakatoshi’s back the way he does when expressing affection and steps forward to greet his childhood best friend with a hug.

“Let me introduce you. Wakatoshi, this is my best friend, Sawamura Daichi. Daichi, this is Ushijima Wakatoshi, my bonded”, says Koushi cheerfully. After they’ve hugged with Daichi, Koushi gravitates back towards Wakatoshi. Wakatoshi feels smug about that. He knows it’s lame, but he can’t help it.

He and Daichi size each other up, until the latter drops the staring contest first and offers his hand for greeting.

“Nice to finally meet you,” he says. Then he addresses Koushi again: “And it’s even nicer to finally meet _you_ again, my wayward friend. Look at you, disappearing for a whole month…”

“I’m sorry,” responds Koushi. He still feels a little guilty, but not horrified or ashamed anymore. “I needed time to sort things out. To accept my new life, you know”.

Daichi’s gaze grows serious, and he nods: “I see, I see”. Then he smiles warmly at Koushi and says: “I’ve missed you a lot, and I’ve been worried for you the last time we’ve seen each other. You haven’t told me anything back then, Suga”.

“Being bonded has been hard for me at first,” admits Koushi honestly, and he slings his left arm under Wakatoshi’s right one, and Wakatoshi suddenly feels hot all over. The way Koushi clings to him, it would never seize to affect Wakatoshi.

“That’s OK; I’m glad to see you happy,” smiles Daichi, and maybe, just maybe, he’s not the bad guy Wakatoshi has pictured him in his imagination. “We all have to hang out together some time, yeah?”

“Yeah” exclaims Koushi enthusiastically. “But then Wakatoshi will have to bring his best friend with him as well, so we are even!”

“That’s even better,” laughs Daichi, and oh, he doesn’t know what he has agreed to yet.

Koushi may look angelic, but in truth, Wakatoshi’s bonded is full of whining, evil humour, and mischief. Perhaps, a month of missing your best friend can make you forgettable when it comes to your friend’s blemishes. Or Daichi is simply weak when it comes to Sugawara Koushi. Then Wakatoshi can relate.

Daichi excuses himself after that, saying, that he has a meeting to attend, and disappears in the crowd.

“You’ve been jealous, Wakatoshi,” comes Koushi’s teasing lilt. “Does Daichi look that good?” And his bonded bats his lashes coyly at Wakatoshi.

“He does,” agrees Wakatoshi easily.

“You’re no fun at all!” huffs his bonded and disentangles himself from Wakatoshi’s arm. He starts moving towards the florist’s shop they’ve intended to visit, and Wakatoshi trails behind. Koushi has nice legs, marvels Wakatoshi absent-mindedly.

“Stop staring!” shouts Koushi at him. He is pleased, though, Wakatoshi can say that much.

“Despite Daichi’s obvious good looks, I am the one who gets to admire you in your boxers only every day,” remarks Wakatoshi casually. Koushi stops in his tracks and turns to look at him, his eyes comically wide and the tips of his ears red. Wakatoshi may be dense, but he is also very stubborn when it comes to learning how to communicate with his closest circle best. If he has been able to grow to understand and enjoy Satori’s sense of humour…

“Not so loud! We are not alone, you villain!” hisses Koushi.

See, Wakatoshi can be smug for real too.

Doesn’t save him from getting thumped on the head full-force with Koushi’s bag.

“Worth it,” thinks Wakatoshi, slowly walking beside his fuming bonded again.

“Totally worth it,” he thinks at home, when Koushi doesn’t wait to step out of his shoes after they enter the flat to draw Wakatoshi into a searing kiss.

Wakatoshi may be the densest person ever, but he’s been able to win Koushi over, and it’s all that truly matters.


	2. Metamorphoses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Wakatoshi and his bonded, Koushi, start living together as a couple.  
> If not for Wakatoshi's bonded and his best friend trying to tear each other to pieces from jealousy, everything would be just shy of perfect.  
> Wakatoshi has changed so much to accommodate to his new life. Will his closest persons be able to do the same for him?
> 
> Or Wakatoshi struggling for peace in his personal life, taking care of his beloved brats and discovering his bonded's kinky side down the road.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone!
> 
> It's been awhile since I've posted the first chapter of this fic (which wasn't meant to be anything other than a one-shot for Kinktober).  
> I really liked this universe and my characters here, that's why I couldn't stop creating headcanons in my head and thinking about Wakatishi and Koushi's life together after they've fallen in love with each other.  
> Also, who knew I would enjoy writing Wakatoshi's POV so much?
> 
> So, here we go: an exploration of the stoic boy's filthy fantasies in two parts.  
> This chapter is part one. Part three will be here soon as well.
> 
> I hope you enjoy!

Wakatoshi has never liked changes very much. Without having much choice, he’s accepted their inevitability in life a long time ago. Nevertheless, every minor change still makes him mildly uncomfortable in the beginning.

Anyway, now Wakatoshi knows better than to stick to his routine as if his life depended on it and expect that any alteration is there to make things worse. There are changes one should appreciate. After all, bonding has been the biggest change Wakatoshi’s ever experienced. The scariest one at that. Yes, it’s turned all his life upside down and made him reconsider all his choices. But it’s given him Koushi – the person Wakatoshi’s grown to love more than anything in the world.

 

A half year has passed since the day of their bonding. Wakatoshi’s life continues changing little by little every day ever since, and, for the most time, it’s a welcome process.

To start with, he and Koushi have become really close. They call each other by given names, for two months now. Wakatoshi keeps thinking with regret that they could’ve gotten to this phase much sooner, but alas, until the fateful “drunken evening” Wakatoshi and Koushi have been living together as good neighbours and nothing more. They haven’t tried hard enough. To make up for that, these days they both are trying to learn more about each other, to be good to each other. To become better persons for each other.

 

Since Wakatoshi has become an adult and left his childhood home, he has almost forgotten how good it feels to share meals with people you care about every day. All his life, Wakatoshi has mostly cooked only for himself. He’s always enjoyed the process, though. Nowadays, Wakatoshi gladly cooks his and Koushi’s morning and evening meals and prepares bentos for both of them. Koushi keeps complaining about smiley faces in his rice because his friends at work can’t stop teasing him at lunch.

Wakatoshi practices a bit and switches to kitties and little bears. Koushi _calls_ him at lunch and whines so loud to the receiver that now Wakatoshi’s colleagues ask him what kind of animal he’s made for his bonded this morning. Wakatoshi answers “A piglet” or “A fox”, earns a nod or a smile and almost feels as if he is a sociable person.

See, little changes come from every direction.

Who knew that cooking for his beloved will make Wakatoshi this happy, though?

Who could’ve predicted that bonding will make Wakatoshi happy in general?

Wakatoshi hides his small smile ducking behind a big green Dieffenbachia leaf. He’s in a greenhouse, he has work to do and his colleagues don’t need more reasons to interrogate him. Wakatoshi can’t fault them, not really. He can’t get used to his new habit of smiling whenever he thinks about Koushi as well.

 

 

It turns out that Wakatoshi likes taking care of the ones he loves. Which is not a surprise, really, what with the way he’s willingly let Satori rely on him for everything and anything for as long as Wakatoshi can remember.

Aside from cooking their meals, Wakatoshi sees to Koushi’s sleep schedule and the amount of time Koushi spends in the gym. He listens to Koushi’s ranting about his working shenanigans and gives advice when asked. He’s given his bonded three anthurium plants to tend to and overlooks Koushi’s first cautious attempts at gardening. He’s even visited Koushi’s childhood home with him and his best friend, Sawamura Daichi, after Koushi invited him to. Koushi and Daichi visit their parents every three months. Wakatoshi and Satori could follow their example here. They are always in touch with their mothers, of course, but they could visit more regularly.

While eating lunch with his colleagues Wakatoshi recalls their day at the house, where Koushi’s grown up, and his impressions of it.

Wakatoshi, Koushi and Daichi have gone there the next week after Wakatoshi’s met Daichi for the first time.

Wakatoshi’s memories of the day spent in Koushi and Daichi’s childhood home evoke mixed feelings in him. First of all, Wakatoshi is glad that he’s had a chance to learn more about Koushi’s past. Second, he’s a little weirded out by what he’s seen and heard.

That day Wakatoshi’s found out that Koushi and Daichi’s bunch’s mother and father couldn’t differ from his and Satori’s two mothers more if they tried. Wakatoshi supposes that these two people would’ve been called “traditional” if they were still on Earth. Puritan maybe? It’s hard to believe that this kind of people still exists, although traditions don’t make much sense on Yukiko-423 where everything is decided according to the laws of science. And still, here they are: a man and a woman whose voices fill Koushi and Daichi with a fierce wish to appear well-behaved. Obviously, Wakatoshi’s bonded is still a little terrified by his parents, as is Daichi. Thanks to his connection to Koushi, Wakatoshi has been able to feel that his bonded loves his mother and father dearly, that he’s missed them, that he’s been relieved and happy to confirm that they do well. This knowledge has made Wakatoshi feel better about these people.

Judging from how responsible and hard-working both Koushi and Daichi are, Wakatoshi can say that this couple of childhood home parents do their job well. They’re raising good citizens for the satellite. Nonetheless, Wakatoshi supposes that these two people have been treating Koushi and Daichi somehow wrong at the times when the latter have been kids. Wakatoshi and Satori’s mothers have been very, very strict; they wouldn’t have survived Satori’s stay at their home otherwise. But neither Wakatoshi nor his redheaded friend (and none of the kids from other bunches the couple has raised whom Wakatoshi is acquainted with) are afraid of their mothers.

There’s more to it. Hearing Koushi say: “Yes, sir!” as a response to his father’s request for help has explained the origin of the phrase in Koushi’s daily lexicon. Now it makes sense that Koushi has used this form of addressing for the first time when he’s felt guilty and Wakatoshi has been the one in charge; it’s still odd to know that Wakatoshi isn’t the only one Koushi addresses like that. It rubs Wakatoshi the wrong way.

 

Another nuance: Wakatoshi can’t figure out what to think of Sawamura Daichi. They still call each other by surnames when meeting in person though in Wakatoshi’s head his bonded’s best friend is filed under just “Daichi” – because Koushi calls him like that. It is very illogical to feel any rivalry with Daichi now when Koushi is bonded to Wakatoshi and seems to be happy with him ( _is_ happy with him, the bond says), but Wakatoshi can’t help himself. Daichi is a decent person, and Koushi doesn’t feel sadness around him anymore. Still, Wakatoshi is wary about the brown-haired man. To know that his bonded has been in love with Daichi for ten years and to witness the oblivious man talking so casually to Koushi is a struggle. Koushi seems to be amused by Wakatoshi’s jealousy; Wakatoshi can only hope that his silver-haired brat of a bonded won’t try to provoke him on purpose. He can’t predict what he’d do then.

 

They’ve organized a “meeting with best friends” as suggested by Koushi on the day Wakatoshi and Daichi have met for the first time. It has happened one week after the childhood home visit. As Wakatoshi has expected, it’s been a disaster. They’ve met at a nice little restaurant on a Friday evening, and in the beginning everything seemed to go fine. But after a waiter has brought their beverages, Koushi and Satori have found a reason to argue and have been quarrelling the whole evening. All the while Wakatoshi and Daichi have been trying to calm them down, only pausing to cast evaluating glances towards each other. To be honest, the other brown-haired man has been observing Wakatoshi so attentively that Wakatoshi’s felt uncomfortable under his scrutiny. Wakatoshi can’t judge him though. It hasn’t come as a surprise that Daichi doesn’t trust him, a complete stranger, to be good for his childhood friend. Wakatoshi has tried to imagine Satori bonded to someone he couldn’t choose himself, and immediately starts feeling suspicion and a slight disgust towards this person. Wakatoshi also knows what kind of first impression he usually leaves. He wonders what opinion of him Daichi has gotten on the day of their first meeting and what Daichi thinks of Wakatoshi now after they’ve interacted on numerous occasions. Has his initial impression changed or not? If it has, than to a better one or to a worse one? It is untypical for Wakatoshi to worry this much about someone’s attitude towards him; Satori would’ve ridiculed him if he knew. Apparently, when it comes to Koushi, Wakatoshi’s usual aloofness disappears, giving place to insecurity and emotional tumult. Even if Daichi is one of his bonded’s closest persons, Wakatoshi shouldn’t be bothered by it this much. But he is, and it’s another change Wakatoshi couldn’t foresee.

Back to consequences of the “friendly dinner”. After that loud and tiring evening, Wakatoshi has had a long talk with Koushi about behaving in public and not being rude on purpose. Koushi’s acted like he didn’t know what his bonded was speaking about. Through their connection, Wakatoshi could feel his annoyance and… petulance? Like a problem child. Wakatoshi has prohibited Koushi to enter their balcony with flowers for the next week as a form of punishment for his childish behaviour. Looking into his bonded’s pouting face Wakatoshi has promised him to take good care of Koushi’s three plants during that week, which earned him yet another tantrum. Admittedly, Koushi can be horrible when he wants to be.

Satori, in his turn, has also received a lecture from Wakatoshi (simply because there’s nothing Satori hates more than lectures he can’t avoid) and hasn’t been invited to dinner at Wakatoshi and Koushi’s flat on Saturday as it has become a tradition for the three of them. While Satori has been sulking in his dorm room in the company of noodles, Koushi hasn’t received any of his favourite meals. The silver-haired man has looked annoyed but he’s said nothing to Wakatoshi. Koushi’s only huffed and puffed when he’s thought Wakatoshi couldn’t hear him. On Sunday morning Koushi has finally had enough of being naughty, troublesome and out of favour. He’s apologized to Wakatoshi and promised to never act up like that again. Unsurprisingly, Satori’s called in the evening and apologized as well.

Wakatoshi can tell: Koushi and Satori are jealous of each other; each of them wants to have Wakatoshi’s time and attention all to himself. To be honest, Wakatoshi also wants to spend more time with each of them. He supposes Daichi wants to see Koushi more often too. The difference is, neither he nor Daichi throw tantrums because of that. As adult, smart people Koushi and Satori could’ve accepted life as it is and stopped troubling their closest circle. They need to realize that each of them is very important for Wakatoshi and Wakatoshi can’t choose sides, as easy as that. Unfortunately, Koushi and Satori can’t quench their immature impulses yet.

After apologizing to Wakatoshi (and to Daichi too, in Koushi’s case), two troublemakers behaved for the next two weeks, and then their quarrelling has started anew. Wakatoshi has decided to not let them meet unless strictly necessary after one ugly episode. Again, it’s brought changes, and this time not pretty ones.

Wakatoshi now has to meet with Satori separately and can’t invite him home when Koushi is there. He also has to visit Satori without his bonded. On the one hand, Wakatoshi sees even less of Koushi and Satori than before. Which is disappointing, to say the least. On the other hand, Wakatoshi’s inner peace is safer when he is _not_ witnessing two of his most precious people fight and insult each other. Wakatoshi doesn’t want to let Koushi and Satori embarrass themselves with their immature behaviour more than they already have. If Koushi and Satori want to act like brats, Wakatoshi will treat them accordingly. If teaching the two of them good manners will require corner time, Wakatoshi will let them have it.

 

No one likes the new order.

Wakatoshi explains his view of the situation to both Koushi and Satori; silly brats can’t find any arguments against Wakatoshi’s judgement. Which is a pity, actually. Wakatoshi has hoped they would show him some new aspect of the problem or, however unrealistic the idea is, apologize to each other sincerely, shake hands and start to _be good_.

The first time Wakatoshi leaves their flat and goes to Satori’s place _alone_ , Koushi looks at him as if Wakatoshi has betrayed him. His bonded feels so hurt and lonely, that Wakatoshi almost changes his mind and stays home. Almost. Wakatoshi is wrapped around Koushi’s finger, he won’t even argue with that. But he has his principles.

In an attempt to regain his composure, Wakatoshi stops at the exit from their house and does breathing exercises. Waves of Koushi’s disappointment and despair threaten to suffocate Wakatoshi. Of course, Koushi has more influence on the matter than Satori. If Wakatoshi lets Koushi affect his decisions through their connection, though, he may end up abandoning Satori completely. Wakatoshi breathes out, straightens his back and starts walking towards the train station. He sends his love and tenderness towards Koushi through their bond, but, apart from all the sulking, receives only petulant silence underlined by slight panic in response. It is a little…disturbing, to be ignored like that. Why does Koushi feel so offended anyway? Hasn’t Wakatoshi proven himself to him? How many times does he need to show how serious he is about Koushi? That he wouldn’t ever abandon him? Wakatoshi doesn’t let the darkness crush him; he’s learnt that Koushi’s feelings (and everyone else’s feelings, more than likely) are not bound to be logical. Soon he can feel Koushi’s panic subside and anger take its place. By the time Wakatoshi’s train ride is over, Koushi’s anger is replaced by resignation and melancholy. Finally, Koushi sends to Wakatoshi a mix of feelings that Wakatoshi can’t interpret other than “I miss you”. Wakatoshi sends his bonded a similar signal and then just keeps his end of the bond wide open to let Koushi see how much he loves him.

This is another (positive) new thing in Wakatoshi’s life: he and Koushi have learnt how to manipulate the bond, how to make it show different amount of feelings at a given moment. They can mute their feelings or demonstrate them in all their glory. When the bond is muted but not closed each of them can still evaluate what the partner feels, however, not in detail. This opportunity allows them to have some privacy which Wakatoshi appreciates. He’s not opposed to feeling Koushi in his head all the time but sometimes even he is irritable or sad and wants to stay by himself for a while.

Luckily, Satori’s roommates often spend their evenings in the city and the redhead has the dorm room all to himself. While at Satori’s place, Wakatoshi watches his best friend attentively, looking for clues, trying to figure out what his friend feels. Satori doesn’t like the scrutiny, of course, but he feels too shy to confront Wakatoshi openly about that. They spend their time together as usual: reading manga, talking about flowers in Wakatoshi’s care, discussing new seeds sent for tests to Satori’s experimental farm unit. When it’s time to go, Satori’s gaze becomes so similar with the one Koushi has given Wakatoshi before he’s left their flat a few hours before, that for a second Wakatoshi feels haunted. He doesn’t want to be the reason of Koushi and Satori’s sadness. Wakatoshi doesn’t have a bond with Satori, but he has a lifelong experience of dealing with him and his moods. Wakatoshi knows that the ginger needs to be hugged tight and told explicitly that Wakatoshi is always there for him. Maybe, Wakatoshi hasn’t vocalized it enough times lately. A round of hugging and reassuring Satori who is clinging to him later they say good bye to each other. Satori’s eyes seem to be a little wet, as if he is on the verge of tears. But the redhead’s smile is warm and his posture is relaxed which means Wakatoshi doesn’t need to worry about him anymore.

However, Wakatoshi leaves his friend’s dorm wondering whether he’s doing the right thing, treating Koushi and Satori like that. This idea of Wakatoshi’s seems to have a strong impact on both of his closest persons (and on him). Isn’t he hurting Koushi and Satori by seeing them separately? Doesn’t he make them feel twice as lonely?

When Wakatoshi returns home, Koushi almost sweeps him off his feet initiating a hug. Wakatoshi grumbles a little but he can’t hide how happy he is to be greeted like that. It seems that Koushi is so relieved that his bonded is back home that he forgets to start pouting and accusing Wakatoshi of heartlessness after being left alone as Wakatoshi has expected.

That night they stay awake longer than they should, lying in bed and listening to each other’s feelings through their bond. Wakatoshi feels like he will never learn everything there is to know about his partner although he tries hard. For the first time, he thinks that there can never be enough time to get to know everything about a person. There is always a hidden variable in every conversation with another person; it’s not at all like the science he’s devoted his life to. Even with Satori, there’s always something more to learn. Wakatoshi is only starting to come to terms with the mechanics of human communication, the unpredictability of it, and the thought surprises Wakatoshi in its simplicity.

While staying awake, Wakatoshi also thinks about Satori and their childhood, about all the shenanigans they’ve had together, about the times when other kids would stray from Wakatoshi throwing him weird looks, and then Satori would appear as if from thin air, smiling and cheering. It took Wakatoshi growing up, bonding and spending half a year with an unlimited access to Koushi’s emotions as an example to realize how much Satori’s presence in his life has influenced him. If Wakatoshi is not good with people in the present the way he is now (and he really, truly isn’t despite all his efforts), he doesn’t even want to know what kind of a senseless wreck would’ve become from that lonely kid he’s used to be if not for Satori. His mothers have helped a lot too, of course, but they could only do as much when they’ve had seven more kids to take care of besides Wakatoshi.

 

After his initial meltdown, Koushi apparently agrees with the way Wakatoshi solves the problem of his constant conflicts with Satori and lets it go. He doesn’t throw tantrums because of Satori anymore. Satori also seems calmer now. The red-haired mentions that with the way Wakatoshi plans their meetings two weeks ahead he can’t find it in himself to feel abandoned. He has something to look forward to and he knows that Wakatoshi won’t cancel on him without a reason. Wakatoshi also notices that he feels more relaxed himself. He didn’t even know how much Koushi and Satori’s negative emotions have been influencing him until he’s started his experiment.

The most important, Wakatoshi can see his bonded learning to trust him more, letting Wakatoshi take care of him more. Wakatoshi enjoys their newfound trust, cherishes it. But Koushi’s behaviour changes in more ways than one, though.

Adding to Wakatoshi’s inner struggle, with each passing day Koushi acts more and more submissive around his partner in their daily life. On purpose or not, Koushi also misbehaves in little things often, as if trying Wakatoshi’s patience. What confuses Wakatoshi beyond all measure is the way Koushi seems to be the most aroused while being scolded by his bonded. Being scolded for laziness or carelessness should annoy a person, not arouse them, right? Koushi seems to be embarrassed about his own reactions to Wakatoshi’s scolding _and_ praise, so Wakatoshi doesn’t acknowledge them openly, but, well… It doesn’t mean Wakatoshi doesn’t notice them. While Wakatoshi tries to reach out to Koushi’s conscious, make him feel guilty, Koushi’s mind seems to go somewhere else. Koushi’s gaze grows a little hazy, his body lax. It’s not like the silver-haired man stops listening to Wakatoshi, on the opposite: in these moments Koushi easily complies with whatever Wakatoshi tells him to do. His bonded feels very content according to their connection. Afterwards, Koushi needs some time to snap from his daze. When he’s back to himself, he is calmer and in a better mood. Maybe, this development is not a bad thing, after all.

Koushi looks so pretty with pink cheeks and lowered eyes, though. Wakatoshi wants to see more of Koushi’s facial expressions and catalogue all of them in the depth of his mind; wants to be the reason of Koushi’s shyness, wants to take everything Koushi would be willing to give him.

Wakatoshi wants to praise Koushi more since every “good boy” that leaves Wakatoshi’s mouth makes Koushi’s breath hitch a little. Wakatoshi wants to reprimand Koushi more often to hear more of Koushi’s “Yes, sir. I’m sorry, sir”. Wakatoshi wants to make Koushi stand in a corner like the kids in old books who’ve earned themselves a punishment were made to. Wakatoshi wants to see Koushi kneel in front of him, naked, remorseful and ready to apologize. Koushi would be so ashamed because of such treatment, so mortified… Sometimes, when he happens to be alone in their flat, Wakatoshi also thinks about other, more abusive forms of punishment from ancient times. Like spanking or bondage. He’s read that these…practices have also been used by adults of the past as entertainment. Wakatoshi is ashamed of himself for getting these ideas. But his attempts to get rid of offending thoughts are futile. When Wakatoshi jerks off he keeps imagining Koushi’s teary-eyed face, pretending that the latter begs Wakatoshi for forgiveness. Wakatoshi hasn’t ever had this kind of fantasies about anyone, let alone masturbated to it. He doesn’t consider himself a decent person anymore.

Wakatoshi has to do something with his inappropriate thoughts; he respects Koushi too much to treat him like a rebellious child or…worse.

 

All in all, two months of separation pass by and Koushi and Satori start to _behave_ for real. They do so well that when first Satori, then Koushi asks to give them a second chance and let the three of them spend time together again, Wakatoshi agrees. He is reluctant to set the date, though. Uncharacteristically for Wakatoshi, he can’t decide whether letting Koushi and Satori meet will be worth it. Wakatoshi’s got used to the new routine. It’s been good two months. Calm. Anyway, a week of nagging from both sides (Wakatoshi’s colleagues inform him that he looks stressed), and Wakatoshi invites both Koushi and Satori to spend time at the satellite’s Aquarium. Satori is loud and tugs at Wakatoshi’s clothes to catch his attention whenever he sees a particularly beautiful fish. Koushi, in his turn, is bored by sea life and keeps quiet. He is jealous of Satori, of course, but doesn’t let it show. The two men interact perfectly friendly on the outside. Wakatoshi doesn’t have any right to demand more from them.

Koushi and Satori continue behaving for the next month and a half. It seems that they are getting used to each other and start to find each other’s company enjoyable. Still, Wakatoshi doesn’t trust his luck and plans their meetings with utmost care. He feels silly but he can’t stop himself from fretting. It is clear as day that Wakatoshi can’t stand heavy emotions from Koushi for too long; he’s still afraid Koushi and Satori would return to hating each other. This would be the worst, he can’t risk it.

 

Speaking of best friends: Wakatoshi and his bonded meet up with Daichi quite often as well. Wakatoshi and Daichi don’t grow to like each other, but they are grown-up enough not to spoil the fun for Koushi by acting weird.

 

 

When it comes to Wakatoshi’s personal life, there’s an aspect that makes Wakatoshi happy.

Wakatoshi and his bonded have a lot of sex.

After they’ve talked about each other’s feelings for the first time, the distance between them has seemed to shrink more and more with every passing day. Neither has tried to rush things. Moving from hugs to cuddles, then to make out sessions and tentative touches, they’ve slowly and reverently explored each other’s bodies. The peak of their explorations – their first time – has happened only after more than a month of just kissing and grinding. Thanks to their bond, Wakatoshi is sure that their first time has been as unforgettable for him as it’s been for Koushi, in a good sort of way

Koushi’s been a virgin; Wakatoshi can’t decide what he thinks of that fact. When Wakatoshi recalls their first time… It’s been like a dream, really. Koushi’s blushed so prettily under the ministrations of Wakatoshi’s deft fingers. The silver-haired boy was trying to hide his face in Wakatoshi’s shoulder, and Wakatoshi’s let him, for once. Koushi has been so responsive, so honest in his reactions. Absolutely charming.

 

Now that Wakatoshi recalls it: there may be more to the issue of Koushi’s insane jealousy than he’s grown to think. When they’ve only started acting like a couple, Wakatoshi has told Koushi that he’s had sex with his best friend (with Satori’s permission to out it). It’s been done with good intentions only: to prevent any ugly revelations from resurfacing later. There must’ve been a way to let Koushi know about this particular thing in Wakatoshi’s past that would’ve hurt him less, though. The memories of this conversation make Wakatoshi groan. Wakatoshi may be still as dense as the Dome’s walls, unfortunately. Some things change slower than the others.

Truth be told, Wakatoshi would’ve most probably stayed a virgin until his first intercourse with Koushi, if not for Satori. Actually, he’s agreed to have sex with his best friend only because Wakatoshi is weak to Satori’s anxious eyes. Back then, Satori has knocked into his big, messy head that he’s weird and unlovable. How this connected with sex and virginity in Satori’s thought process, Wakatoshi couldn’t guess. But Satori has said he _needed_ to lose his virginity there and then, and there was no person in the world he trusted more than Wakatoshi.

Wakatoshi doesn’t think it’s been a mistake. He’s felt better knowing that no stranger will spoil his best friend’s important moment. They’ve gone slow, but only in the very beginning. Once Satori has gotten rid of his insecurities, his enthusiasm has been only rivalling his endurance. A one-time “losing virginity” project has turned into a long “sex exploration” expedition. They’ve tried out all things Wakatoshi agreed to try out (thankfully, Satori didn’t insist on trying out something _too gross_ ). They’ve had sex in every position known to Satori at the time, switching from topping to bottoming according to the redhead’s moods. If Wakatoshi is honest with himself, he has to admit that they’ve had a lot of fun learning how their bodies function.

They’ve put their explorations on hold when Satori fell in love with some girl.

They’ve had sex with each other from time to time, when Satori’s heart has been free, falling into nice predictability while reacquainting themselves with each other’s preferences.

They’ve had no sex since Wakatoshi and Satori finished university; it’s just happened so.

Beside Satori, Wakatoshi’s had several partners, but neither of them has interested him in any aspect other than sex. Wakatoshi has never initiated intimacy himself and has never tried to learn his flings better. Actually, Wakatoshi suspects that he’s been a big jerk back then. Satori has advised him to at least tell his “victims” beforehand that he only wants a one-night stand. Wakatoshi’s followed this recommendation, and still, some girls and boys have yelled at him and called him heartless. Satori’s version was that these were the unhappy ones who’s fallen in love with Wakatoshi. Maybe the redhead was right, maybe not. Anyway, Wakatoshi feels his ears going red at the tips when he recalls how he’s treated some of his sex partners. He can only hope that he’s become better at communication since then.

After hearing Wakatoshi’s story, Koushi’s called Wakatoshi’s relationship with Satori “friends with benefits”. Wakatoshi and Satori haven’t ever given it any name, haven’t felt the need to define the thing going between them. The term Koushi’s used sounds wrong and shallow to Wakatoshi’s ears. Wakatoshi doesn’t repeat it. Wakatoshi could feel Koushi’s jealousy flare when he’s been narrating, but he’s thought it was only natural and would fade with time. Wakatoshi’s assured Koushi that he and Satori are only friends now. Naïve simpleton that he is, Wakatoshi has considered it enough. Now that Satori and Koushi spend a lot of time in each other’s company maybe it’s time to pay attention to this issue.

 

Wakatoshi asks Koushi one evening whether he feels threatened by Satori because of his and Wakatoshi’s mutual history. They sit on the couch in the living room, their knees touching slightly. Koushi’s eyes become comically wide after hearing the question, and it all goes down the hill. Wakatoshi hasn’t felt so many negative emotions from Koushi since the “drunken evening”: fear, insecurity, self-deprecation… Wakatoshi senses his bonded’s clumsy attempts to shut the emotional connection between them and decides to put a stop to it. He pulls Koushi closer by a wrist when the latter tries to flee from the couch, hugs Koushi to his chest and pats his head, helping the silver-haired man to fight off his panic. Wakatoshi swears at his own denseness, again. What a choice of words, damn. But, also, how was Koushi able to hide this avalanche of feelings from Wakatoshi so well? And here Wakatoshi thought he’s been very attentive to his beloved’s state of mind.

When Koushi is coherent enough to talk he reveals that he’s been constantly thinking about how inexperienced he is, how Wakatoshi might possibly wish he could have sex with Satori instead of his bonded and that he only sleeps with Koushi because he has no other outlet. To say that Wakatoshi is surprised would be an underestimation. For several long moments, he just sits on the couch where the news has hit him, unmoving and blinking stupidly into space, until Koushi pushes a glass of water into his hands and makes him drink it. Then Wakatoshi’s confusion is getting replaced by hurt and sadness. It’s still hard to concentrate on his surroundings when the only emotion he can recognise is a deep disappointment in himself. As always, he’s been not enough when it’s come to communicating his feelings to others. He should’ve done the explanations better, he could’ve been more thorough. He should’ve reassured Koushi more often. He should’ve told him that he’s enjoyed their time together each and every time they’ve been intimate. But, thinking of it, he has, now hasn’t he?...

Wakatoshi’s spiralling is only interrupted by the distress signals from Koushi coming through their bond. Wakatoshi blinks, breaking the spell, and sees Koushi sitting on his knees on the floor in front of him, his eyes red and teary. He looks like a broken ball-jointed doll, an awkward pile of long pale limbs, pitiful and lifeless. His bonded is looking up at Wakatoshi with so much pain in his expression that Wakatoshi curses himself inwardly once more. Please, anything, but not the crying Koushi. Again.

As soon as Koushi registers Wakatoshi’s gaze on him, he starts babbling. Wakatoshi sinks to the floor beside his lover and tenderly hugs him again. First, Wakatoshi has no clue how to shush Koushi gently, without startling him. Koushi keeps repeating that he’s so sorry he’s hurt Wakatoshi, he’s so sorry that he’s never enough, he’s so sorry Wakatoshi has to deal with him and his emotional baggage… To listen to these admissions is excruciating, to say the least. Wakatoshi doesn’t have enough words to prove to Koushi that he’s so, so wrong with whatever assumptions he has constructed in his head without Wakatoshi knowing.

Then an idea pops in his head. What if he could put this silly thing they have going on to a good use…

“Koushi,” demands Wakatoshi firmly, “Look at me”.

A dishevelled mop of silver-grey hair jerks from its hiding spot on Wakatoshi’s chest and then two pretty copper eyes peer at Wakatoshi from beneath wet lashes. Wakatoshi has to swallow to concentrate on what he’s going to say to distract himself from how gorgeous and delicate his bonded is. So pretty.

“Good boy,” praises Wakatoshi, smiling at Koushi. The other boy frowns at him unhappily. He wants to contradict but thinks better of it and refrains from saying anything. Wakatoshi braces inwardly and continues:

“Can you do me a favour?”

Koushi nods. Wakatoshi chastises sternly:

“Use your words, Koushi. Let’s try again: Can you do me a favour, Koushi?”

Whether it’s because of Wakatoshi’s tone or the reprimand itself, but Wakatoshi can suddenly feel a pang of arousal from Koushi through their connection. Maybe, his slight surprise shows on his face, but Koushi must realise that Wakatoshi has caught him. The silver-haired boy blushes crimson, lowers his eyes in embarrassment, but still, he murmurs his answer, barely intelligibly:

“Yes, sir.”

“Very good,” hums Wakatoshi. “Then go to the bedroom, please, get undressed, take a seat on the bed and wait for me.”

It’s not what Koushi has expected after the word “favour”, but he repeats his humble “Yes, sir” once again and hurries to obey. Wakatoshi mutes his bond and takes his time assessing the damage. He has mostly recovered from the initial shock of the revelation. Does he feel anger towards Koushi? Does he maybe consider Koushi ungrateful? The answer to both questions is a “no”. So, it’s been the fact that Koushi felt unsure and unwelcome all this time because Wakatoshi couldn’t articulate his thoughts properly that’s been his undoing. Wakatoshi can’t bear the thought of hurting his bonded. Wakatoshi contemplates the idea of calling Satori to get a piece of advice but quickly dismisses it. What if Koushi overhears? He goes for a text:

 

**Wakatoshi:**

_How do I prove to Koushi that I don’t want to have sex with anyone else?_

 

Wakatoshi taps “send” and hopes that his friend has his phone with him. He’s lucky, and not a minute later he receives a reply.

 

**Satori:**

_He crazy? U never look at other people at all!_

 

30 seconds later, another text comes in.

 

**Satori:**

_Tell Koushi he’s stupid!11!!!_ ಠ▃ಠ”

 

Then another.

**Satori:**

_No, u better not. Wakatoshi. Ur the best! Just fuck him nice and slow and promise him that_ ur _precious big dick belongs to Koushi and no one else._

Wakatoshi manages to type and send a _“thank you”_ before another text from Satori comes.

 

**Satori:**

_I miss it, dude ⊙﹏⊙ but it’s Koushi’s now I get it yeah? Sorry if I said smth wrong to him._

 

Wakatoshi smiles despite himself and answers.

**Wakatoshi:**

_No, Satori, you’ve been very polite lately. Thank you for supporting me. Now I will go talk to Koushi. Good night, Satori._

 

When Wakatoshi stands up from the couch, ready to go comfort his bonded, he sees a _“Good luck!”_ text chime in. Wondering, just how quickly Satori is able to type, Wakatoshi enters the dimly lit bedroom.

Koushi is sitting at the edge of the bed, naked and shivering. That’s not an effect Wakatoshi was going for; he should have thought about Koushi possibly feeling cold. He has to keep his appearance though. That’s why Wakatoshi comes closer and says, in an even tone: “Such a good boy for me, Koushi, waiting for me patiently.” Then he orders: “Now, climb under the covers, I’ll join you in a minute.” While Wakatoshi undresses, Koushi sits with his back against the pillows. His figure looks stiff and small, and he is awfully quiet. Koushi has muted the bond too, it seems, because all Wakatoshi gets through the thread of their connection is dulled sadness. Wakatoshi climbs under the covers, settles beside Koushi and opens his end of the bond wide. There’s sadness, too, and the remnants of shock, and mostly forgotten insecurities, but above all else, there’s love for Koushi. Wakatoshi gives his bonded time to explore it all: his protectiveness, his possessiveness, his desire. Wakatoshi even lets Koushi glimpse at his most shameful thoughts; those where Koushi cries and begs. Wakatoshi realises though, that he only wants Koushi to cry because he’s overwhelmed by nice sensations; because he feels safe to show his emotions, too; because he trusts Wakatoshi enough to fall apart in front of him. Because he’d let Wakatoshi put him together afterwards, and knows that Wakatoshi would do that with utmost care.

While taking stock of Wakatoshi’s feelings, Koushi clings to his bonded, sniffling from time to time. His own part of the bond is still muted, but Wakatoshi has no right to pry, he can only wait patiently in hope that Koushi will let him back in eventually. The silver-haired man seems to be listening very attentively to what Wakatoshi feels at the moment; it must be a difficult task – to try and distinguish different emotions of another person when they’re tangled like that. After a while, Koushi’s breathing evens out and his heartbeat slows. It’s almost as if he’s fallen asleep. Wakatoshi has submerged into his own thoughts so he’s startled when Koushi nips playfully at the side of his neck and asks innocently: “So what’s with the emotion that feels like you want to eat me whole after I myself will beg you to do just that?”

Wakatoshi was sure that he can’t blush, that it’s physically impossible for him. Turns out, he’s been wrong.

Seeing his prudent lover at a loss for words, Koushi laughs, airy and light, doubling over and blinking tears from his eyes. Then he looks up at Wakatoshi, takes in his mortified expression, and his beautiful laugh morphs into a series of ugly snorts and cackles. Koushi is having so much fun at Wakatoshi’s expense that all Wakatoshi wants is to get rid of that smug smile on Koushi’s face. But his bonded is not done with teasing yet. It is infuriating, really. “Wow, Wakatoshi. So big and scary,” manages Koushi between the fits of laughter. “What are you going to do with me to stop me? Spank me?”

The next thing Wakatoshi knows is that he’s pinning Koushi to the bed and growling at him. He wants to stop himself, wants to back off and calm down, is ready to apologize, but Koushi moans below him, low and wanton, arching his back. His bonded also opens his bond fully at the same moment, letting Wakatoshi see everything he feels: reciprocated love, trust in Wakatoshi, happiness at being desired, arousal and anticipation of something wonderful. There’s no fear, not at all. However, Wakatoshi takes a second to relinquish control over himself; there’s no way he’s going to let his emotions take the lead. Wakatoshi won’t let himself loose, but he won’t fight his urges either. For the first time in his life, he’ll let himself feel this way and enjoy his domineering side. If Koushi seems to be on board with Wakatoshi’s perversions, then he has to at least give it a try.

Wakatoshi leans down and whispers right into Koushi’s ear, his breath tickling the silver-haired man’s earlobe: “Oh, baby, you are definitely in a need of a good spanking.” Koushi shivers under him, his breathing becoming faster. Wakatoshi continues: “If I only could, I would take you over my knee right now, turn your backside bright pink; make you scream and kick; make you beg me for forgiveness. Imagine yourself on my lap, helpless and so, so sorry.” Koushi starts whimpering and struggling a little in Wakatoshi’s hold. Wakatoshi lifts his head up to look him in the eye and almost purrs: “You’re such a naughty boy, Koushi, you know that? It’s a pity I can’t punish you the way you need me to. The nanites in my body won’t let me, baby.” Koushi stares up at him, his pupils blown, his lips red and bitten. “Please, Toshi,” he whispers. “Please what, baby?” inquires Wakatoshi with exaggerated interest. “Please, punish me. I want to be a good boy… for you,” utters Koushi, and averts his gaze in shame. Wakatoshi questions his last statement: “Do you really want it, Koushi, dear? Then why would you hide so many doubts from your bonded for so long?” Koushi’s face indicates distress at that, and Wakatoshi gently shushes him. “I know, I know, you didn’t want to hurt me, right, baby?” he says, pecking Koushi’s cheeks and scrunched eyebrows. “Yes, Toshi. I’m so sorry!” Koushi hurries to assure. Wakatoshi lets Koushi’s hands go, cradles Koushi’s head in his broad palms and kisses him in order to prevent another portion of crying. It helps. They kiss, and they fondle each other, and for an indefinitely long moment, everything is forgotten, except for their little happy bubble.

When they finally part for breath, Koushi stares Wakatoshi in the eyes dazedly. Wakatoshi smiles at his lover tenderly and offers: “Let me blow you now, and tomorrow we’ll think about a proper punishment for my naughty boy. Sounds good?” Koushi closes his eyes in embarrassment and mutters his consent. Wakatoshi starts caressing his beloved, trying to soothe his nerves and at the same time not to spook the mood. “I want to be good,” says Koushi stubbornly letting his bonded trail kisses down his chest and stomach. “Don’t worry,” reassures him Wakatoshi, his lips hovering millimetres above Koushi’s dick: “You’ll be very, very good, Koushi. I’ll find a way to make sure of it”. Then neither of them talks: Wakatoshi too engrossed in sucking his beloved off and Koushi too busy moaning out his pleasure.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading!  
> If you managed to make it until the end of this, then I'm really glad)
> 
> Please, tell me what you think! Your comment means a world to me!
> 
> I'd be very glad to make new friends on Tumblr! [Maria-Falka](http://maria-falka.tumblr.com/)  
> Come yell at me if you want))


	3. A World of Wonder

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again!
> 
> Welcome to my personal rarepair hell!
> 
> I am finally finishing this chapter! It took so long! I haven't written a couple of scenes I really wanted to write ;( maybe I'll have enough courage to post them as drabbles later? I also want to write Koushi and Satori's talks separately. 
> 
> The fic that has given the origin to this AU (now the first chapter) is 6k words. The second chapter is about 9k words.  
> The third chapter - 11k words, seriously, me?
> 
> Let's hope it's good))

The next morning Wakatoshi is still confused over one thing. Satori knows full well that all it’d take for him to get fucked by Wakatoshi back in the day was one suggestion. Satori says he’s been craving sex with Wakatoshi, but why didn’t he simply ask? While Koushi is still in bed, Wakatoshi sends a text to his best friend.

**Wakatoshi:**

_If you have you been missing my dick since uni, why haven’t you initiated sex?_

 

Five minutes later comes a reply.

 

**Satori:**

_There’s other fish in the sea, Ushi ;) My love to ur dick is more … platonic?_

 

Wakatoshi smiles a little. His best friend is ridiculous. Another incoming text from Satori dings on his comm.

 

**Satori:**

_Why u ask? Miss my embrace so much? ;)_

 

**Wakatoshi:**

_No, it was just illogical. You’ve lived just fine several years but yesterday it’s turned out you’ve missed my dick._

 

**Satori:**

_There’s no logic in what someone feels, Ushi! Ur a big boy, time to understand that!_

 

Wakatoshi frowns at the screen: even Satori thinks he is too dense. But Wakatoshi doesn’t have much time to wallow in self-doubt. The door to the bedroom opens, revealing a sleepy Koushi. Half-lidded eyes, hair a mess, his grey pyjamas in disarray, and nonetheless, Koushi is a vision. Wakatoshi can’t take his eyes off his bonded.

He’s so whipped.

How could his bonded even think that Wakatoshi would dream of someone else when he has Koushi?

The vision, meanwhile, yawns loudly and staggers to the kitchen, nearly tripping over his own feet. Wakatoshi watches, amused, how Koushi tries to open a water bottle without opening his eyes fully until the latter mutters: “I can hear you laughing at me in your head, Wakatoshi!” and Wakatoshi comes to rescue. He opens the bottle, waits until Koushi makes a few gulps and then sends Koushi to the bathroom to clean up. Then he feeds the freshly-showered Koushi breakfast, watching how his beloved’s lazy morning person morphs into his usual energetic self. Koushi becomes more talkative with every passing minute and eaten bite of his meal. Koushi hates the process of cooking, but he very much appreciates its results. He never refuses home-made food when offered. “He’s similar with Satori in this,” muses Wakatoshi inwardly, “They’re similar in many things, actually. At least Satori has no morning moods.”

“Are you listening?” enquires Koushi in mock indignation.

“Yes, you’ve been talking about this kid from your work, Tadashi, who’s bonded with a total jerk now,” reacts Wakatoshi immediately. Years of Satori’s endless ranting honed his background listening and memorizing abilities. And increased his reaction rate, because it is so like Satori to stop amidst a three-hours long monologue to ask “What do you think, would Gon be a successful killer if he would’ve been raised in the Zoldyck family?” or “What country of the old Earth would you like to visit the most?” or even “Do you think I’d be an Omega in an ABO universe?”

“Exactly!” exclaims Koushi, seemingly unperturbed by Wakatoshi’s obvious lack of proper focus. “And to think his bonding happened during the second phase – Tadashi is two years younger than us, he’s 22 – that this petty boy is his second-best variant!... It’s not even funny if you ask me!”

“Our bonding has happened during the third phase and we haven’t been able to find common ground for a while. But then we’ve made an effort and it’s brought us where we are now,” reminds Wakatoshi. “ Do you feel sorry that it happened the way it happened?”

“No!” defends his bonded. “It’s not the same!”

“They have no way out of this. Tadashi could give the “blonde jerk” a chance. You’ve given me a chance, after all. That boy can’t be worse than me,” jokes Wakatoshi. Unexpectedly, his joke is met with a serious face from the silver-haired man.

“You’re wonderful, Wakatoshi,” says Koushi in a very earnest tone. “You’re smart, and kind, and caring, and patient, and talented…” Koushi trails off with his compliments seeing that Wakatoshi is distracted. “What? Are you spacing off again?” he frowns.

“Sorry,” says Wakatoshi, “You just look so good when you’re concentrated on something.” Not mentioning the pretty blush that’s covering Koushi’s cheeks now, Wakatoshi asks: “Do you really think I’m talented?”

The enthusiasm returns two-fold. “Yes!” nearly shouts his bonded. “I know you’re genius with plants, but if someone takes a closer look at you – they’ll see that you do everything you try perfectly! You can cook, and knit, and look after small children, and…!”

“Thank you,” says Wakatoshi under his breath. He won’t try to argue with Koushi, it’s useless, even if he exaggerates Wakatoshi’s virtues. But it’s nice to know that his beloved has such a good opinion of him. It really helps to forget about his doubts from the day before – about how helpless he is when it comes to the world of communication. His inadequacy in human interaction may be true, but Koushi cherishes him nonetheless, so, maybe, Wakatoshi isn’t as hopeless as he used to think. The bond can’t lie; Koushi honestly admires him. Wakatoshi is deeply moved.

They spend several minutes in silence, contemplating their next words. Finally, Wakatoshi initiates a Talk. They discuss their misunderstanding from yesterday, they apologize to each other for assuming things, they promise to confide in each other more. After they feel that everything has been said, they go to the couch and cuddle there, enjoying each other’s warmth. Luckily, it’s Saturday, they don’t need to go to work. Wakatoshi caresses Koushi’s silver hair absent-mindedly when his beloved suddenly stirs in his arms and declares:

“You’ve promised me a punishment, Toshi.”

Wakatoshi has completely forgotten about this part of their previous evening while discussing relationship matters. The worst (and the best) thing is that now, when they’ve made up and all is right with the world, Koushi is up to mischief. Wakatoshi feels a thrill himself looking into his bonded’s glinting copper eyes. Koushi disentangles his limbs from Wakatoshi’s, smirks, lowers his head to Wakatoshi’s shoulder and bites at it, hard. It’s quite painful and Wakatoshi winces. Koushi looks so pleased with himself, backing off from the couch in slow steps. He even sticks his tongue out for good measure. Some naughty boys don’t know when to stop, do they?

 

Fifteen minutes later, and Koushi is on his knees in a corner in the living room. He’s holding his hands behind his head, there’s a wooden chopstick in his mouth that he has to hold with his teeth and his pyjama pants are lowered just enough to bare his round ass. His genitals stay hidden, but a bulge on the front is unmistakable. In contrast to him, Wakatoshi is fully clothed. He’s changed out of his pyjama pants to a t-shirt and joggers before Koushi woke up.

“Do you like it, baby? Standing on your knees in a corner with your pants under your arse?” asks Wakatoshi in a careless tone. He’s sitting at the kitchen counter, with a perfect view of Koushi’s pale ass cheeks. An unintelligible angry mumbling is his only response. Putting something into Koushi’s mouth has been a great idea. His cheeky comments wouldn’t let him enter the right state of mind otherwise.

Wakatoshi has to admit, it’s been a struggle to put his boy into this corner. Koushi’s kicked and pushed back, not in earnest, of course, and still, he's caused a lot of trouble for Wakatoshi.

To be true, even if Koushi would try for real, he wouldn’t be able to overpower his bonded. This is irrelevant though. The major point is, Koushi’s enjoyed the process of being put into place. Wakatoshi hopes that this one time when he had to use physical power will be the only time, that this demonstration would be enough. He fears he may accidentally leave an unwelcome bruise or scare his bonded if they continue playing rough. Or that their games will cause a reaction from the nanites in their bodies, which would be highly unwelcome.

For now, the silver-haired brat kneels in the corner obediently, chewing at the chopstick in his mouth in irritation. Irritation is a wrong emotion, though. Wakatoshi wants his bonded to feel ashamed, like a punished naughty boy should feel, not angry, as if he has any right to judge Wakatoshi or snarl at him. It’s time to teach his Koushi a lesson.

“Oh, I guess you do like it after all. You’ve tried so hard to anger me yesterday and today, haven’t you, darling? Now look where it’s brought you. My neat Koushi standing with his pyjama pants down in a corner… Is it what you’ve always wanted? To show everyone just how naughty you are?”

Wakatoshi pauses, giving Koushi time to get a little self-conscious about his state of undress.

“Ah, I forgot, you can’t answer me. Bad boys don’t get to talk, do they?” Wakatoshi hums in consideration, listening to Koushi’s mumbled curses, and offers: “I should’ve washed your mouth with soap for all the rude words you’ve shouted at me, huh?”

Koushi freezes, then lowers his head, mortified. They both know he’d let Wakatoshi do just that: bring Koushi to the bathroom, hold Koushi’s head above the sink and literally soap up his mouth, all the while musing how much Koushi needs to be taken down a notch or two. The images frighten Koushi and thrill him at the same time. His posture relaxes a little, though, and Wakatoshi knows he’s going in the right direction with his verbal assault.

 

Yesterday, in the heat of the moment, he’s told Koushi he’ll punish him for keeping all to himself, for causing a meltdown for both of them. But that’s not a thing that deserves a punishment, of course. It’s just a slice of their lives, an unfortunate miscommunication. Wakatoshi can’t issue a rule that will oblige Koushi to tell him every little doubt he feels. It’s not what they need. To make Koushi wary of everything he says or thinks, make him concerned about what he should tell Wakatoshi and what not, would be superfluous and downright toxic, in Wakatoshi’s opinion.

Both of them are unique persons with a unique set of needs and wishes.

Sometimes Koushi wants to be submissive around Wakatoshi, to be put in his place. Sometimes Wakatoshi wants to supervise Koushi’s every move, tend to his every need until Koushi grumbles that he is capable of taking care of himself.

But most of the time, Koushi is just Koushi, he’s self-sufficient, independent and appreciative. Wakatoshi is just Wakatoshi, who gives his bonded a lot of care, but also enough privacy. They as a couple work like that.

Koushi is also prideful. Wakatoshi has to be very accurate not to get his boundaries wrong when they’re still experimenting. The way Wakatoshi sees today’s game it should serve to their mutual pleasure: an outlet for the weird desires for both of them, a new way to take care of Koushi for him.

No hard topics, no discomfort. Only indulging in their fantasies.

Scolding Koushi for rudeness is a safe and easy way to pretend that Wakatoshi has the authority to physically discipline him.

Because despite all the power rush Wakatoshi may feel while seeing Koushi submitting to him it is what they really do: pretending. Playing.

 

Everything goes as planned. The position and the state of undress do things to Koushi’s head, even when Wakatoshi stays silent. Soon Wakatoshi doesn’t sense the strain which his bonded has felt previously. Seems that his boy has accepted his situation and won’t cause an additional ruckus. Wakatoshi stands up from his survey point and comes closer to the kneeling figure. Koushi’s breath hitches at his proximity. Wakatoshi crouches down and pets his lover’s ass, eliciting a shiver from him.

“It’s a real pity you can’t get a spanking you deserve, my pretty little brat. But don’t worry, I won’t let you go without a proper punishment. Take it obediently, and you will be done soon enough. Can you keep your quiet if I take the stick out of your mouth?”

Koushi nods at that. He looks docile enough, and Wakatoshi decides to give him a chance to show that he can behave. Wakatoshi takes the chopstick away, puts it on the closest table, and Koushi stays perfectly still, holds his position without prompting.

His submissiveness influences Wakatoshi more than expected. He feels suddenly _hungry_ and impatient, and it should transport through the bond, because Koushi shivers again and his breathing quickens. Wakatoshi commands him to stand up, and Koushi does so, keeping his hands by his head although Wakatoshi hasn’t told him to. It’s nice to see Koushi trying to be good for him. Wakatoshi tells his lover to put his arms down, then walks him to the couch and orders to lean over the couch arm, with his groin lying on the armrest. The lowered pants stay in place, leaving Koushi’s backside open. Wakatoshi gives his bonded a plush pillow to hug, which Koushi does, gratefully. He’s breathing fast, his whole body taut with anticipation. Wakatoshi strokes his back in reassurance and explains the technicalities of the punishment.

“Since you like to tease so much, baby, I want to give you a taste of your own medicine. I’m going to put a vibrator up your ass. I will play with it for a while but I won’t let you come. If you take it without complaints, I will forgive you. If you’re really good I will reward you in the evening.” Wakatoshi gives his bonded a second to take it all in, then asks: “Do you agree?” Koushi nods. They’ll have to think about safewords for the next time they play. For now, Wakatoshi just says: “If you tell me to stop, I’ll stop. You hear me, Koushi?” Koushi nods again. They may proceed.

Wakatoshi has an additional safety net people from the past didn’t have – their emotional connection, but he still hesitates. He takes his time rummaging through their little toys collection, choosing the one he needs, then looking for lubricant. After that, he just stands there and listens attentively through the bond. Koushi is aroused, a little nervous, a little afraid. Looks like he is positively sorry for being rude to Wakatoshi before. Even if all of that was for show, Koushi feels like a punishment is justified. It makes him serious about doing well for his bonded.

Despite his doubts, Wakatoshi realises that even if all of this has been a bad idea from the start, the worst thing to do would be to stop now, to leave Koushi hanging. Wakatoshi braces himself and allows his more predatory side to take control, hoping it’ll be OK in the end.

He brings the necessary items to the couch and lays them in front of Koushi’s face. Koushi, who’s been holding the position perfectly, inhales sharply and starts trembling, just a little bit. Wakatoshi puts a comforting hand on Koushi’s lower back, rubs gently in circles until the trembling subsides, then slicks the fingers of his left hand and starts prepping his bonded’s ass. This part is familiar, safe, and his bonded relaxes under his touch. Wakatoshi notices that Koushi tries to hold in his whimpers and says: “No moving from the position and no words, Koushi. But you can moan and make other sounds if you want.” Koushi doesn’t hesitate to make use of this freedom, and soon a litany of small whimpers and mewls is falling from his lips without pause. Wakatoshi doesn’t bother with long preparation: the vibrator he’s picked is slim and won’t hurt Koushi even without much warm up. He thrusts two fingers in and out of Koushi’s channel one last time, earning a breathy moan, cleans up his left hand with a wet napkin and takes the vibrator. It’s long and purple, with a wireless control; Koushi’s choice. Wakatoshi starts putting the toy in, slowly, letting Koushi adjust to the intrusion. It’s not that they haven’t played with this vibrator before, they have done it a lot of times, but never in a scene where it was supposed to be a punishment. Wakatoshi takes his time. Also, they’ve tried edging, but not orgasm denial. Wakatoshi can only hope this game won’t be too much for Koushi.

“That’s it, baby, you’re doing so well,” whispers Wakatoshi when the toy is all in. “Now I will start it. Don’t move your upper body or your hips from the armrest. Tell me to stop, if it’s too much.” Koushi nods and suddenly he looks highly concentrated. Wakatoshi’s mind almost short circuits from how cute his bonded is. He looks so defenceless, so vulnerable, with his ass in the air and a pillow in his embrace. And, on the contrast, this determined expression of his. So cute. Oh, Wakatoshi won’t let his enthusiasm go to waste.

The vibrator stirs to life inside Koushi, and the boy can’t hide a long moan. They know already that Koushi has a lot of stamina, but Wakatoshi hasn’t ever pushed him quite like he plans to now.

Wakatoshi lets the tension build up until Koushi is close. The first time Koushi is on the brink of orgasm, he digs his teeth into the pillow and his hips twitch with the effort not to rut against the couch arm. Wakatoshi lets the vibrations die down to the lowest setting, giving Koushi time to rest. The timing was too fast, for Koushi, and for the next round Wakatoshi slows down a bit, plays milder.

It’s incredibly arousing, to see Koushi like this: out of control, whining and whimpering, at Wakatoshi’s mercy. Good thing that Wakatoshi’s pants are quite loose and he took some precautions, positioning his cock so that his boner won’t be too obvious. Not that Koushi is able to pay attention to such things now. Wakatoshi planned not to let himself come until Koushi is allowed to. Previously, it seemed easy enough. Now, it looks almost impossible. Wakatoshi has to chastise himself, because he’s not the one who is stimulated repeatedly, held on edge, crying out from overstimulation, and yet, he’s so hard and aching that it seems one caress to his dick would trigger his orgasm. He can’t find it in himself to feel ashamed for being so easy today, though. Koushi suffers so beautifully for him. He whines pitifully every time Wakatoshi speeds up the toy in his ass, but as he promised, he doesn’t complain. Koushi’s fingers hold on to the pillow so tight that Wakatoshi fears Koushi might reap the fabric. In the haze of lust, Wakatoshi tries to pay attention to the bond, but there’s not much more apart from arousal, trust and the fierce wish not to disappoint Wakatoshi. Or so Wakatoshi deciphers the emotions that flow from Koushi to him.

From time to time, Wakatoshi praises his lover, or comes closer and pets his back, or kisses him lightly on the nape. When he does that, he feels something warm flutter through their bond. Something, that makes Wakatoshi feel special.

Koushi keeps his eyes closed most of the time as if he wouldn’t be able to fight the onslaught of sensations if he would open them. When Koushi’s denied for the second time, Wakatoshi gives him a longer pause to breathe and calm down. To his surprise, Koushi starts sniffling, a few drops sliding down from the corners of his eyes. Is he…crying? That’s so unexpected and confusing, that Wakatoshi stops in his tracks. At the same time, there’s no distress among the red-hot bundle of emotions that flow from Koushi’s side of their bond. Does it mean Wakatoshi should continue? Maybe, he’d better stop and make Koushi talk to him? The break stretches, long enough that Koushi opens his eyes and looks at Wakatoshi questioningly. Wakatoshi’s signals must be clear to Koushi and he must be coherent enough to realize that Wakatoshi is panicking. Koushi’s lower lip trembles, he looks tired, and the tears are falling freely now when his eyes are open. But Koushi finds the power to smile reassuringly at Wakatoshi, making Wakatoshi’s heart clench painfully in his chest. Thanks to that small gesture Wakatoshi feels calmer, feels in control again. When Koushi considers Wakatoshi stable enough, he furrows his brows in false anger, as if urging Wakatoshi to continue.

Wakatoshi presses “on” on the remote, and Koushi nearly wails. His whole body trembles with the effort to stay in place, his legs making small abortive moves as if he can’t hold them completely still. Wakatoshi has strewn a towel over the armrest as a precaution, and when Koushi raises his hips a little more, Wakatoshi can see a large wet spot where his dick touches the fabric. Koushi holds onto the poor pillow for dear life and outright mewls with every vibration of the vicious toy inside of him. Of course, he hasn’t stopped crying since he’s started. Now, that the initial shock of seeing his bonded in tears is gone and Wakatoshi can think straight again, he thinks the reason for the tears may be the overload of sensations.

There is a “positive” effect from Wakatoshi’s moment of fear: it’s helped to lower his libido and now he can concentrate on Koushi without coming in his pants.

Koushi… Let’s say he is a sight to behold. He looks much, much better than Wakatoshi’s masturbation fantasies: the picture in Wakatoshi’s head was simpler, cleaner and definitely not as impressive. Koushi is all sweaty, his torso and face went red in blotches, his face is wet with tears… and snot. The real Koushi is… He’s just the real thing? There will never be enough words to express that.

An outright tsunami of feelings overflows Wakatoshi and threatens to drown him.

The living, existing Koushi is right there, in Wakatoshi’s flat, in Wakatoshi’s _life_. Koushi trusts his bonded, he lets himself be completely on display for Wakatoshi, he’s given himself over to him. _He loves Wakatoshi back_. That’s the best of it all. Somehow, mysteriously, only in this moment, Wakatoshi allows himself to finally believe that Koushi loves him back for real. All the doubts get erased. All the other parts of the puzzle fall away, unnecessary.

He brings Koushi to the edge again, one last time, a little faster than he’s planned. Koushi could’ve taken more; he was expecting another round, maybe. They both know that, but Wakatoshi can’t play any longer. He _needs_ to hold Koushi close, to speak to him about his revelation, or not to speak, just hug his beloved and enjoy their closeness.

Carefully, but a little hurriedly, Wakatoshi extracts the toy from his bonded’s arse, cleans him with a napkin, pulls up his wayward pants and then he’s lifting Koushi to his chest, and holding him close, and telling him how much he loves him. Koushi is mildly surprised, and laughing at him, and hugging him back, and all he can think about is only _Koushi, Koushi, Koushi_.

In the evening Wakatoshi makes love to his bonded in the slowest and most sensual way, making him cry again, this time with tender touches and lingering kisses. Koushi comes twice, and he is soft and pliant in the end, happy and all Wakatoshi’s.

 

The next day Koushi announces that he’s liked their little game and that he wants to play more. Every day, maybe. Wakatoshi is not as emotional as the evening prior. He’s more amused by such reaction than equally enthusiastic, but he is not opposed to the offer. He will always let Koushi decide, when and how, though. His worst fear is to force Koushi into something he doesn’t want to do but is unable to refuse.

 

To Wakatoshi’s utter surprise, they _do_ start playing these games almost daily.

Subsequently, the games become less and less innocent. Not that one of them minds.

Using trial and error method, Wakatoshi finds out that a mix of slight humiliation and strict orders works best for Koushi. He uses his knowledge for all its worth.

Another nice consequence is that Koushi seeks his bonded’s attention with a neediness Wakatoshi would’ve hardly expected from him.

Wakatoshi can’t find it in him to complain.

 

 

It’s a nice Friday evening, and Wakatoshi is finally home from work.

The new timetable of Koushi’s is horrible. His partner now works in twelve-hour shifts: two working days, then two holidays and so on, while Wakatoshi still goes to his laboratory for eight hours from Monday to Friday. This time, both of Koushi’s holidays (Thursday and Friday) have fallen on Wakatoshi’s workdays. Which means that Wakatoshi will only be able to have breakfast with his beloved in the morning and then go to sleep together in the evening. It’s frustrating, but Wakatoshi will bother about it tomorrow, waiting in an empty flat for Koushi to come back.

But for now… Everything is more than fine. Wakatoshi washes his hands, changes into domestic clothes, pours himself a glass of juice, all the while ignoring a silent kneeling figure in the centre of their living room.

So their plan to play is still valid.

Wakatoshi has sent Koushi a text with an order to assume the position when the train he has taken from work was pulling to his stop, which means Koushi has spent on his knees at least 15 minutes. It is usually enough to put him in the right state of mind. When they first started their experiments, they agreed that Koushi leaves his part of the bond open wide during their games, while Wakatoshi mutes his part of the bond so that his feelings don’t distract Koushi from his current role. Thanks to that Wakatoshi can see Koushi’s emotions clear as day: he can’t wait to start playing, he's missed his bonded, he’s a little nervous and very, very aroused. Sounds just right.

When Wakatoshi feels that he’s made his bonded wait enough, he strolls to the spot where Suga kneels on a throw pillow with a lowered head, his hands folded neatly in his lap. On the inside, Koushi is bursting with impatience. On the outside, he’s calm and docile. Wakatoshi needs to harmonize it. Let Koushi feel a lot of things and demonstrate them all on the surface.

"Colour, Koushi," asks Wakatoshi sternly.

"Green, Sir," answers his boy evenly.

It’s such a relief that Koushi prefers to be obedient most of the time, like today. Wakatoshi _loves_ bringing his bonded pleasure in reward for good behaviour. Not that he dislikes their more violent activities, but this will always be the best: making Koushi feel good for submitting to him.

Wakatoshi eyes the silver-haired man at his feet attentively. And god, does he like what he sees.

Peeked and no doubt reddened nipples strain against Koushi's orange button-up shirt. The thin fabric does nothing to hide it. Wakatoshi can't wait anymore to tease his lover. He crouches down behind Koushi's back and rubs his broad palms over Koushi's chest in circles, making the boy gasp and squirm. Koushi's arousal spikes when Wakatoshi starts rubbing his nipples with purpose, concentrating his attention on the hardened nubs, his touch just on this side of painful. Wakatoshi retracts his hands when he hears a whimper from Koushi. A little more, and the nanites in Wakatoshi's body will prevent him from hurting his bonded. They've never pushed too far before, but  Koushi hates the moments when they have to stop an action he likes because of their changed body chemistry. To distract him, Wakatoshi starts petting Koushi's head, his neck, his sides. Koushi leans into his touch, as far as he is able to without breaking his position.

Wakatoshi understands Koushi very well. He hates his inability to give his beloved what he wants. But that’s the reality of their lives, and Wakatoshi pretends that he’s stopped on his own volition.

He praises Koushi in his husky game voice:

"What a good boy, Koushi. Teasing your nipples just for me, aren't you wonderful? Tell me, what have you done to make your poor little nubs so sensitive?"

"I... I rubbed them," mumbles Koushi. It’s a miracle how he can be so suede in usual life and then so shy in these special circumstances.

"Yeah," encourages Wakatoshi, "what else?"

Koushi pauses, fighting his embarrassment. Finally, he whispers, meekly and hardly recognizable: "I pinched them and ... I tugged at them."

Wakatoshi hums in approval. Everything goes smoothly so far.

"Take your shirt off, baby. I want to see you."

While Koushi is busy with the buttons (he's obviously taking his sweet time with the task), Wakatoshi asks, curious: "Were you pinching your nipples while I called you from work as well?" This question has been on his mind since lunchtime. The task his bonded has received sounded “make your nipples very sensitive so that you'd feel my every touch“. Wakatoshi hasn't specified what Koushi had to do.

"No, Sir," answers Koushi hesitantly.

"No? But your voice sounded a little strained, so I thought..." Wakatoshi stops speaking, prompting Koushi to give an explanation. It might be entertaining.

"When you called me, I had..." starts Koushi, freezes and shuts his mouth, again.

"Yeah, baby boy, please, tell me? I want to know," enquires Wakatoshi, now really puzzled.

Koushi takes his time with the answer. Wakatoshi doesn't pry; he can see Koushi struggling to form a response. From their bond, he feels surprise and embarrassment, coupled with desire. So Koushi's enjoyed playing with his nipples a lot, but he hasn't expected Wakatoshi to ask.

After a minute of squirming Koushi closes his eyes and almost shouts in one go:

"I had clothespins on my nipples. I put them there when I answered your call."

The boy looks absolutely mortified. From Wakatoshi’s point of view, it’s a nice look on his silver-haired lover. Not that he’ll compliment him openly now. Instead, Wakatoshi makes a surprised sound, causing a slump of Koushi's shoulders and another rush of arousal inside of him.

"What a naughty little boy," toots Wakatoshi in mock indignation. Satori would be proud of his best friend and his improved acting skills.

Meanwhile, Koushi seems ready for the ground to swallow him wholly to hide from Wakatoshi and his teasing. It’s not a bad thing, though. Wakatoshi can tell that his bonded is falling into the headspace he likes: under Wakatoshi's spell, without the need to decide anything.

Wakatoshi continues: "I didn't know you were so lewd, baby. I've just told you to make your nipples sensitive. Make them pretty and red before my return. And what did you do? You've put pins on them when I called you and, I can guess, enjoyed your little secret."

Wakatoshi shakes his head in fake disbelief. "Did the pins squeeze your nipples nicely while you talked to me about your day?"

"Yes, Sir." Koushi sniffles and trembles slightly. Ah, here it comes, Koushi's perfect self-control finally starts to slip. His lover is almost there.

When he relinquishes all power to Wakatoshi, they will have so much fun together.

Wakatoshi hums in acknowledgement.

"I haven't ordered you to use toys on your chest, have I? We agreed that you would use toys in my presence only, didn't we? Now I won't see with my own eyes how you gasp in pain when you take the pins off, how you rub the sting away, wincing slightly...”

Wakatoshi pauses, as if in thought. Then, he announces his “decision”:

“I think I can't leave it like that. Stand up, boy. Go put your nipple clamps on."

Koushi can't hide a panicked gasp. He even has enough courage to protest:

"But, Sir, my nipples are so sore already..."

Wakatoshi won’t be swayed easily.

"And whose fault is that?"

Koushi drops his head even lower.

"It's my fault, Sir... I, I'm sorry..."

Koushi rises gracefully from his kneeling position, walks slowly to the chest of drawers where he holds his playthings, finds necessary items and puts a small metallic nipple clamp on each nipple, wincing when little metal toys bite his flesh. Wakatoshi waves a hand at Koushi, urging his lover to come closer.

Koushi approaches him in small steps. While standing, he holds his hands behind his back. As expected from him, he doesn’t raise his head.

Wakatoshi asks in an even voice:

"Does it hurt?"

The answer is immediate but barely audible.

"Yes, Sir."

"Good. Naughty boys need to be put in line." Wakatoshi pets Koushi's head in silent approval.

“Now tug lightly on your right nipple,” orders he then.

Koushi obeys, gingerly taking the clamp in his right hand and tugging at it. Koushi can’t conceal a hiss of pain at this action.

“Enough. Now punish your left nipple too.”

This order earns another quiet hiss. Koushi’s breathing becomes more ragged.

Wakatoshi can’t resist looking into his lover’s beautiful eyes. He cradles his jaw in his hands tenderly and lifts his head up. Koushi melts into his touch. As always, his eyes are mesmerizing. The pupils are blown, the overall expression on his face is about barely suppressed lust fighting with embarrassment.

Wakatoshi’s palms leave Koushi’s jaw and the silver-haired boy lowers his gaze submissively again.

“I like the way you look with your nipples pinched. It’s so unfair that I can’t touch them now. You’d want that, pretty boy, wouldn’t you?” And Wakatoshi slides his hand across Koushi’s sternum, barely missing the left clamp. The simple move elicits a whine from his lover. The silver-haired boy must’ve spent quite a lot of time fantasizing about the treatment Wakatoshi was going to give him and has wound himself up.

“Looks like someone is a little agitated today,” comments Wakatoshi offhandedly. “Are you so hungry for my touch, baby? That you even had to use toys to quench your desire?”

Koushi just stands there, listening to his bonded, with his eyes downcast. His ears burn, his cheeks are rosy and he is very, very sexy to Wakatoshi’s eyes. At the same time, he is so adorable that Wakatoshi suddenly feels an urge to hug him tight and never let go. Cuddle him to death.

Instead, he orders:

"Take your pants and underwear off and present yourself, Koushi."

Koushi obediently tugs the rest of his clothes off. Wakatoshi regrets rushing this part, seeing as Koushi’s small, lewd black panties leave his hips following the pants. He could’ve used this item as another reason to tease Koushi.

Meanwhile, Koushi lowers himself, gets on his hands and knees and raises his hips up, showing off the end of the bright purple plug hidden in his ass. The clamps now hang down from Koushi’s nipples under another, more painful, angle, and they pull with every small move, making Koushi wince. Another reason for him to stay very still, just like he’s supposed to.

Wakatoshi thinks that he’s trained his boy well in the course of the last two months. In the beginning, Koushi could hardly withstand assuming different poses for Wakatoshi to look and enjoy. Koushi would happily submit to a punishment, pretending that if Wakatoshi wouldn’t use his authority to bring him into a shameful position he wouldn’t ever be in it. That their game doesn’t have anything to do with him liking the thrill of being put on display and humiliated. That he (and his own fantasies) are completely innocent. Koushi couldn’t let himself be sexy for the fun of it. Is it another result of his upbringing? Getting horny thinking of forbidden pleasures and at the same time feeling ashamed because of it? Satori used to say something about people being too serious about this stuff. No one suggests that a satellite citizen should be provocative in their daily life, but there’s no rule to adhere to black-and-white morals while you’re in your own bedroom.

It’d be interesting to take a peek at what Daichi is up to on the sexual front, just to be able to compare him with Koushi…

Wakatoshi mentally slaps himself and returns to the present.

“What’s your colour, Koushi?" asks Wakatoshi again.

"Green, Sir," answers Koushi unhesitatingly.

“Good,” half-smiles Wakatoshi.

His precious lover stands perfectly still, and Wakatoshi pets his lower back in appreciation. They’ve had a long training session with Koushi not a month ago, where Koushi had to put an additional clothespin on his body for every unnecessary move or any flaw in his stance. The pins also didn’t make his task easier. He looked quite silly in the end, with multiple little colourful pins covering his torso, ass and legs. Wakatoshi gave him another chance that same day, of course. Koushi managed to finish with much fewer pins than before. Needless to say, that Wakatoshi has been especially generous that day and has given Koushi as many chances as the latter needed to keep a perfect position until he's managed to stay completely free of pins…

Wakatoshi swears at himself for being too distracted today. He has a sub to handle; he doesn’t have time to space out.

"That's right, baby, just like that. I'm pleased that you've made your pretty little hole ready for me. Such a good boy." Koushi, who tensed at Wakatoshi’s feet during the prolonged pause, relaxes visibly, melting at the praise.

“How did it feel today? You’ve invited over that Tadashi kid, haven’t you?" asks Wakatoshi.

Koushi inhales loudly. Oh, the silver-haired brat hates (and loves) this part. Wakatoshi has been reluctant to include this kind of scenes in their repertoire, but Koushi’s reactions were worth it.

“Yes, Sir. Tadashi had lunch with me after you've called me. He praised your cooking, Sir.”

“That’s nice to hear. Tell him I’m glad. But you haven’t answered the first question, Koushi. You know which one.”

Koushi keeps quiet. It’s the first act of misbehaviour Koushi allows himself today. Must be still a tough topic for him. Seconds pass by in silence, and Wakatoshi decides to push.

He orders in a stern voice: "Stop stalling and tell me."

While Koushi keeps quiet, Wakatoshi speculates: "It must have been very uncomfortable for you, to sit through a lunch with your friend having a plug up your ass. I’m sure you’ve been fidgeting in your seat, trying to be as subtle as possible...”

This earns another wave of embarrassment from Koushi, and yet, he doesn’t speak up. Seeing Koushi's reluctance, Wakatoshi almost changes his mind and cancels the task, but, in the end, Koushi braces himself internally and murmurs:

"It felt mortifying, Sir. To know I'm the only one who has a toy inside. To think that Tadashi may notice somehow, may ask me something…"

"I guess you're controlling yourself much better now," comments Wakatoshi. “You’re very, very good for me, Koushi.”

This elicits a shuddered breath from the silver-haired boy. The first time they’ve tried this sort of play together at home Koushi was so nervous he could hardly eat anything; afterwards, when he stood up and thanked Wakatoshi for the meal, there were tears in his eyes. Wakatoshi has had to get his bonded off quickly and then soothe him with kind words and gentle touches. Wakatoshi has been worried but when Koushi came back to himself, he thanked Wakatoshi so profusely and looked so pleased with himself, that Wakatoshi couldn't deny him another play. And one more. And so on, until Koushi asked permission to involve third persons. Actually, Tadashi was their first unknowing “victim”. Whatever Koushi’s verdict may be, Wakatoshi is not inclined to favour games involving others. Too risky in his opinion.

Reacting to the praise, Koushi says humbly: "Thank you, Sir." After a little pause, he adds quietly: “I was so horny afterwards, I could hardly keep my hands to myself.”

For the thousandth time, Wakatoshi can’t stop his imagination from running wild: Koushi, alone and with a boner, tries to distract himself by any means. Anything, to prevent touching his own dick. And he has another task at hand – to tease his nipples, which will turn him on even more… Again, Wakatoshi mentally scolds himself and concentrates on Koushi.

“But I assume you’ve managed to stay good,” says Wakatoshi meaningfully.

“Yes, Sir, how could I not!” rushes to confirm his boy. Oh, he’s so much fun to play with.

Wakatoshi slides his hand along Koushi’s side tenderly and commands:

“Stand up and turn to me now.”

Koushi follows his order and assumes his previous pose. When he lowers his head, his hair falls over his eyes a little, as usual, and Wakatoshi can’t see his eyes at all. It’s a pity that exactly this position strikes the most submissive response in Koushi. Koushi may think it’s been chosen for Wakatoshi’s aesthetical pleasure or as a standard pose for a sub, and it’s a part of the picture, yes, but a very small one. In truth, Wakatoshi has, again by the method of trial and error, found out what position does it for Koushi, has gone with the flow and has been sticking to it since then. If he was choosing for himself, he would’ve preferred Koushi with his head held high, so that Wakatoshi could enjoy each and every facial expression Koushi could give, each gaze of his gorgeous eyes.

As a sort of conclusion, Wakatoshi asks his lover:

"Did you like it? Sitting there at the kitchen table and thinking only about the plug stretching your channel, feeling it shift with your every move?"

Unexpectedly honest, Koushi nods, his cheeks flushed. It’s nice that he’s enjoyed it, but he has to give verbal answers.

“Use your words, Koushi, don’t make me discipline you.”

Koushi hurriedly says:

“Yes, I liked it, Sir. Sorry, Sir.”

Wakatoshi decides he’ll let it slip this time.

"That’s better. Now, take the clamps off. Slowly, baby, one at a time.”

Wakatoshi always likes this picture – Koushi releasing his red and swollen nub, trying to contain his whines when the blood rushes back where Koushi’s chest has been squeezed. How the silver-haired man lingers a second too long before grasping the second clamp and causing himself another moment of pain. How he breathes through it and looks up at Wakatoshi proudly for a blink when he’s done with the task.

“Let me soothe the sting for you,” offers Wakatoshi. “May I lick them?"

"Yes, please, Sir..."

Koushi can't help but moan while Wakatoshi teases his red and aching nipples with his tongue. His hands clasp and unclasp behind his back since he is neither allowed to touch Wakatoshi nor to move without his bonded's command. Not allowed to touch himself, sure enough.

Koushi’s dick must throb between his legs, what with the way it’s so hard and leaking on the floor. Ah, Wakatoshi definitely likes this kind of games. He’s barely touched his lover, and yet, the boy is literally going wild with arousal.

Koushi is a dream. So responsive, so desirable, so full of life.

Wakatoshi can’t resist the temptation. He brings Koushi’s arms from behind his back, lifts both Koushi’s hands to his face and kisses each palm, eliciting a nearly shocked gasp from Koushi. His bonded's skin erupts in goosebumps and he starts panting.

Koushi is being so wonderfully compliant today. Again, Wakatoshi can’t fight his wish to lift Koushi up in a bridal carry and to bring him to bed.

There’s no protocol for Wakatoshi’s unplanned shenanigans, so Koushi clings to him, relishing every point of contact he can get. Even if Wakatoshi is fully closed while Koushi is naked (and plugged). Koushi feels helpless and undeniably safe at the same time.

In the bedroom, Wakatoshi lays his beloved down gently, shushes him and makes him orgasm just by playing with the toy in his ass and licking his nipples. Koushi whimpers, oversensitive, and comes untouched all over his belly, clawing at Wakatoshi’s clothed shoulders in an attempt to ground himself. Wakatoshi cleans him up with a napkin gently, then finally, finally, undresses. He’s forgotten about his own trouble while admiring Koushi but now he _needs_ to come. If Koushi is too tired to be fucked, Wakatoshi would be satisfied with anything, even just masturbating to the image of post-orgasmic Koushi. But when Wakatoshi takes off his briefs, Koushi suddenly tugs at his arm and makes him almost stumble into bed.

Koushi… let’s say Koushi can be insatiable and tireless in certain moods.

Luckily for Wakatoshi, it’s one of those times.

This moment, Koushi is pleased, and happy, and _grateful_ , and when Koushi feels grateful he can be quite generous. Turns out it’s Wakatoshi’s turn to lie back and take it.

Where does all this energy come from? Wakatoshi will consider it later, because now…

Koushi teases his member with his talented mouth, holding Wakatoshi on edge, but not letting him find release. Wakatoshi knows that begging won’t help, he just has to endure it. It takes all his self-control not to buck up in Koushi’s mouth, not to ruin his partner’s pleasure at playing with his body. How could he when Koushi is so proud of himself and excited? The edging goes on and on, the sounds Wakatoshi makes becoming more obscene with every minute, until finally, his bonded gives Wakatoshi a small break. It does not help much in the sense of relieving sexual tension because Koushi uses this time to stretch his own ass additionally in preparation of fucking himself on Wakatoshi’s cock, and Wakatoshi would be damned if this was not one of the most enticing pictures humanity has ever seen.

Wakatoshi has thought that being blown by Koushi at this point is excruciating, but then the real torture begins. Koushi has come once while Wakatoshi has been hard for the whole evening and didn’t have a chance to get off yet. Wakatoshi’s problems don’t bother Koushi, though. It seems, he is thoroughly enjoying himself, riding Wakatoshi hard and ruthless. Wakatoshi’s bonded is concentrated to the max, his whines and gasps of pleasure mixing with his fast breathing.

Wakatoshi always marvels how effortlessly they switch from Master and his boy to just lovers. It wouldn’t be a big deal, but… When they are just lovers, Wakatoshi allows Koushi to do anything he wants. It’s not exactly a backward power exchange, but it looks and feels very close to it. Koushi knows already that there are very few things that can weird out his bonded (he sometimes jokes that one day he will have to thank Satori for that) so he doesn’t limit himself. Because the bastard knows that nothing brings Wakatoshi more joy than seeing his beloved happy.

Wakatoshi can’t completely chase away the thought that he completely and utterly spoils Koushi with his complaisance. It’s a little reassuring that Koushi actually never behaves this selfish outside of the bedroom, and still, the educator in Wakatoshi is very unimpressed.

However, Koushi is so beautiful when he is like that: sweaty and passionate, with his hardened dick bobbing between his legs with every move up and down…

Wakatoshi zones out too much today. He comes to himself at the feeling of something sticky landing on his chest. Ah, his bonded has come for the second time and rides out his orgasm. Wakatoshi needs just a little more to topple over the edge himself, and when Koushi clenches around him, it’s more than enough. Wakatoshi comes hard inside his lover’s ass and then just lies there, motionless, with a boneless heap of Koushi as additional weight on his chest.

Later, he’ll have to tear off Koushi’s hands from his neck, urging him to let go and help to clean the mess. Koushi will pretend that the puddle of his own release on Wakatoshi’s upper body is exactly where he wants to be until Wakatoshi will get fed up with Koushi’s antics and will threaten him with a banishment to the couch, and only then will the little brat comply…

But for some time now, Wakatoshi can ignore the sticky feeling on his chest, his tiredness and his thirst and bask in the feeling of exceptional calm and happiness that gives him Koushi’s presence.

 

 

 

Three more months pass, and Wakatoshi finds himself in a rather questionable position.

He is sitting at the headboard of his bed in his and Koushi’s bedroom, holding Koushi’s hands in his tightly. Koushi’s lean body, meanwhile, is spread on the left side of the bed, with a cushion under his groin which props his ass up, making it look plumper. At the other side of the bed, with a small wooden paddle in his hands, sits Satori, who is about to spank Koushi’s already rosy ass cheeks some more.

Koushi squirms in Wakatoshi’s hold, looking desperate, scared and repentant.

Wakatoshi knows it’s just a mask.

From their connection, he can see that Koushi is thrilled to be where he is.

Wakatoshi is not a prude. He trusts Koushi to know what he wants in sex. Moreover, he’s often played with Koushi just on this side of painful, as much as the nanites would allow. Now he realizes: that was it, the line he doesn’t want to cross in their sex life. Deep inside, he feels grateful to the creators of the Bonds Control System for the restrictions they’ve imposed on every Satellite's citizen. He didn’t want to cause Koushi more physical pain than he’s already had, ever. The idea makes him cringe. Even if it is what Koushi wants. Even if he sometimes really wishes he was able to spank Koushi with his own hands, _hard_ , for all the mayhem Koushi causes.

Satori, on the other hand, is fine with inflicting pain on Koushi. More than fine, actually, if his predatory grin is anything to go by.

This leaves Wakatoshi with one important question: if the idea of hurting Koushi bothers him so much why does he sit here, literally lending a helping hand to the other two?

 

The answer is simple.

Satori can play Wakatoshi well enough.

Koushi can play Wakatoshi even better.

The two of them together will be the death of Wakatoshi.

 

Wakatoshi has entertained the illusion of being the boss of them while he’s been trying to make these two stop fighting with each other. His tactic has been a huge success, if you look at how happy Koushi and Satori are to play together now. But Wakatoshi is not equipped for herding cats, it seems.

Wakatoshi thinks he’s made a mistake, letting them befriend each other.

Maybe, this course of events has been inevitable and he couldn't have changed anything if he tried. Maybe, everything could’ve gone differently.

There was still a chance though that if only Wakatoshi hasn’t come home late that evening two and a half months ago, he could’ve stayed in control of the situation.

Wakatoshi hates Mr Tardy and his motivational speeches with all his heart.

How has Mr Tardy even earned his position as a unit leader? Wakatoshi has seen his “scientific” works: a bare minimum of necessary explorations, a lot of shallow phrases – just a badly constructed flashy cover for the mediocrity of its author. Wakatoshi refuses to believe Satori’s words that some posts can be won rather by fawning than by professionalism. The day when he agrees that a tough ass to sit on through meetings is of more worth than a sharp mind he may as well transfer to the Dome cleaning service.

His thoughts are interrupted by a yelp from Koushi who’s just received his first hit with the paddle. Koushi wiggles his butt on the cushion and tries to break free from Wakatoshi’s hold. In vain, of course. Earning no reaction from Wakatoshi, his brat of a bonded lifts his big, bottomless copper eyes at him and asks in a trembling, heartfelt voice: “Toshi, please, tell him to stop! I haven’t done anything _that_ bad!”

Koushi sounds so truthful and sincerely hurt that, if Wakatoshi didn’t know better and also didn’t have a roughly 9 months long experience of dealing with Koushi’s mischievous side, he would’ve believed him without a hint of doubt. That would be a big, horrendous mistake. Koushi’s little devil must be kept under strict control, otherwise, there’s a looming threat of his cockiness overpowering his rationality and plunging everything into chaos. OK, maybe Wakatoshi exaggerates a little, but still, being Koushi’s caregiver can be exhausting.

To Wakatoshi, Koushi’s love to being dominated looks like a compensation mechanism of some kind. Koushi, who is responsible to a fault, who never stands back when something important happens, who mothers not only Tadashi but all of his younger colleagues, who’s spent all his life being in charge of something or someone, - Koushi wants to forget about his responsibilities for a while and let someone else, someone whom he can trust, make the decisions. Wakatoshi feels honoured to be that person.

The main problem in Wakatoshi’s point of view is that he finds it harder and harder with time to stay objective when it comes to Koushi.

It makes no sense to him, the growing difference between the way Wakatoshi views his beloved in comparison with how Koushi’s colleagues view him. Or even between the way Wakatoshi has viewed Koushi at the beginning of their life together and the way he views him now.

The recent example: the previous week Wakatoshi’s finally met this friendly boy with greenish hair from Koushi’s work who’s claimed to be bonded to the worst jerk ever born (now the boy says that the jerk is still as awful as before, but he’s managed to find a seed of good in his bonded). The boy’s name is Tadashi, again. Said Tadashi always talks about Koushi with so much respect and awe, praises his team work a lot, admires how insightful and level-headed Koushi is. It’s all good, but Wakatoshi sometimes doubts that they talk about one and the same man. He reminds himself that the Koushi he’s met has looked the same to him as he now looks to Tadashi; that Koushi truly is an independent and reliable person and Tadashi is not at all wrong in his opinion. Wakatoshi would argue with anyone who disagrees.

The Koushi he usually sees around though is an impertinent brat who strives on challenging Wakatoshi (and being put in line each and every time he does so). This image tends to prevail in Wakatoshi’s conscience now.

Koushi’s butt, meanwhile, receives one painful hit after another with the wooden implement Wakatoshi knows from experience (Koushi’ experience, not his own, of course) is truly vicious. The silver-haired man squirms and strains in Wakatoshi’s hold, yelping and complaining. His ass looks rather sore already, but, honestly, Satori will have to be more convincing to break Koushi’s resolve. Actually, Koushi’s endurance has increased a lot since they first started. Be it a month ago, he’d be in tears by now. Strangely, but this revelation fills Wakatoshi with a sense of pride.

He’s so fucked.

 

Smack!

Smack!!

Smack!!!

 

Wakatoshi almost winces in sympathy when a particularly hard stroke falls on Koushi’s left ass cheek. Usually, he wouldn’t sit here wordlessly letting them use his hands as a kind of restraints. Usually, Wakatoshi _loves_ talking to Koushi during their sessions, loves scolding or embarrassing him. Not this time, though. He’s not in the right state of mind for this today. Thankfully, Satori handles everything on his own just fine.

Then again, who can understand a brat’s needs better than another brat?

 

That damned Mr Tardy from his work, after all…

Seeing him during lunch today has efficiently spoiled Wakatoshi’s mood. The moron hasn’t left Wakatoshi’s thoughts since then.

If he didn’t give such long speeches Wakatoshi wouldn’t have to sit at work for one additional hour that day two and a half months ago, listening how Mr Tardy grovels before his superiors and praises his methods of management. Then he wouldn’t be late to the dinner with Koushi and Satori at their flat. If he came to the flat on time, Satori and Koushi wouldn’t have spent at least 45 minutes in each other’s company without his supervision. If Wakatoshi made it in proper time, he wouldn’t find Koushi and Satori on the couch in the living room, bonding over their love for Wakatoshi’s quirks and becoming partners in crime.

Let me introduce you my closest and most beloved persons – Koushi and Satori, two gossip boys.

Wakatoshi’s best friend and his beloved have so much blackmail material on him. Not that Wakatoshi doesn’t own his own base of damaging information on both of them. But, unlike the other two, he won’t use it unless absolutely necessary. He has his principles.

His childhood friend doesn’t have any. To think of it, Satori has told Koushi how Wakatoshi has always covered for him when they’ve been kids, each and every time they’ve done something forbidden together. A very honest boy, Wakatoshi would lie through his teeth to shield his best friend (who’s been the reason for their problems 99% of the time). But when it came to Wakatoshi’s own rare shenanigans, where Satori’s had no part in, Wakatoshi would admit his fault as soon as he’d been caught. Satori’s even narrated that particularly embarrassing story about Wakatoshi’s then only blossoming love for plants.

Wakatoshi’s been 10 years old and entranced with cacti in the childhood home’s little greenhouse. One big cactus was meant to come into bloom in the night. Wakatoshi couldn’t lose the opportunity to watch the moment when the flower would appear. He reasoned that his mothers wouldn’t allow him not to sleep the whole night watching a cactus blooming because it wasn’t healthy. That’s why he decided to sneak into the greenhouse at night, not even taking Satori with him.

It’s been one of the most disappointing moments in Wakatoshi’s young life. The cactus hasn’t blossomed and Wakatoshi has fallen asleep on the floor near the flowerbed. Thanks to his robustness, Wakatoshi hasn’t even caught a cold. Nevertheless, he’s been rightfully scolded and prohibited from visiting the greenhouse for the rest of the week.

The cactus has blossomed the next night. Wakatoshi won’t ever forget Satori’s mournful gaze. His friend hasn’t said anything to him, just patted him on the back in sympathy, but his look said it all: “How could you not invite me on one and only adventure of your own choosing and then fail so spectacularly?” Needless to say, that all other Wakatoshi’s expeditions have been thoroughly planned and always included Satori.

Anyway, Satori shouldn’t have told all this to Koushi.

And who knows what Koushi has told him in return?

When Wakatoshi came into the flat that evening, Koushi and Satori were amidst a vivid discussion of how Wakatoshi can ignore all other people surrounding him in the street, dodging and avoiding them of autopilot, even pausing at the right time at the stop lights, when he moves somewhere with his typical single-minded focus. The boys were so engrossed in their talk that they haven’t noticed Wakatoshi’s arrival at all.

It’s been a joy to see Koushi and Satori being friendly to each other, but for what price? They will be ganging up against Wakatoshi for the rest of his life.

Returning to the present, Wakatoshi catches a worried glance from Satori from where he leans over Koushi’s back, whispering filth.

Wakatoshi feels how a small smile stretches his lips, instantly erasing all worry from Satori's features.

They will also take care of Wakatoshi for the rest of his life.

 

“So, Ushi, what do you think about this pretty little boy and his punishment?” asks Satori in a conversational tone when he’s done with his spanking program.

“I think his ass looks much better now, all red and sore,” answers Wakatoshi, following the scenario.

“U-huh,” agrees Satori. “What’d you say, has he had enough for his insolence?” adds the redhead, shaking his head in negative so that only Wakatoshi can see.

Wakatoshi pretends to be considering this. The session has been intense, even if the two brats think otherwise in the heat of the moment. In the end, he sighs and mutters in a sympathetic tone: “I’m afraid we have to stop now. Even if his attitude still needs correction.”

Tearful copper eyes look at him reproachfully. Wakatoshi indicates to Satori to move a bit, lets Koushi’s hands go and takes his lover in his arms, wary of his aching backside. Satori hasn’t spared Koushi, the bastard. Koushi will be unable to sit without fidgeting for the next few days, reminding Wakatoshi about his spanking and making Wakatoshi’s thoughts all hazy with lust.

On the inside, Koushi is as thrilled as before, if maybe a little floaty.

Satori catches his friend’s gaze in search of a hint what to say next. Wakatoshi grins at him a little and exclaims in mock surprise:

“Satori, have you noticed how hard he is?”

Koushi’s ears turn red and he hides his face on Wakatoshi’s chest.

Satori toots in his sing-song lilt: “Koushi, so naughty of you! It was supposed to be a punishment, you know!”

Wakatoshi glides his hands along Koushi’s lean stomach, grazing his nipples and eliciting a quiet gasp, all the way down to Koushi’s indeed hard cock. He touches it lightly, making Koushi shiver and squirm, then collects the pre-come gathered at the tip and strokes it a few times. Koushi all but melts in Wakatoshi’s embrace, producing soft mewls and whimpers.

Wakatoshi stops, not bringing Koushi even close to the edge. He gives Satori a sign to start cleaning, petting Koushi’s sides and back while waiting for Satori to bring him an ointment for Koushi’s punished butt and a clean washcloth.

Koushi stirs in his arms and looks up at his bonded with a pout. Wakatoshi gently presses a finger to Koushi’s lips and chides him:

“Stop pouting, baby. You’ve been bad and you know it.”

“Not so bad at all,” grumbles Koushi.

“Oh yeah?” intervenes Satori who’s brought the supplies and now sits close to the other two. “What about shouting at Wakatoshi in the groceries shop?”

“It’s been… an accident,” mutters the silver-haired man.

Wakatoshi can relate to his bonded. He’s guessed that Koushi has had an extremely hard day at work. He always gets too antsy and a little irrational on such days. His job is much more nervous than Wakatoshi’s, for obvious reasons, and sometimes Koushi needs a distraction.

“Really now?” Satori goes on with his taunting. “What about telling Wakatoshi to fuck off when he’s asked how your day was?”

“I… apologize for that,” mumbles Koushi.

“So you do admit you’ve been unbearable?” insists Satori.

Koushi squirms, holding his eyes down, ignoring the last question and enjoying the feeling of how Wakatoshi’s big hands are rubbing the soothing ointment in circles on his sore behind. After a pause, he winks mischievously at Wakatoshi and murmurs: “Maybe, just a tiny little bit unbearable?”

Wakatoshi feels a strong urge to ask Satori for another round of discipline for Koushi. Why does he let this horny boy do this to him? Koushi shouldn’t look that smug with his cherry-coloured butt. OK, but now Wakatoshi _is_ in the right state of mind.

Wakatoshi tugs at Koushi’s left nipple lightly with his clean hand, catching his attention. Koushi immediately stops squirming and his smile fades. Koushi knows full well what his bonded is hinting at, and that thing he would rather avoid at all costs. Koushi swallows anxiously.

Wakatoshi feels a little guilty for enjoying the feeling of power he gets whenever his beloved truly submits to him.

Lately, they’ve been using nipple clamps solely for punishments. Koushi has never liked nipple play too much, opposite to Wakatoshi (and Satori, but they won’t tell Koushi that).

This time, it’s Wakatoshi’s domain and Koushi won’t argue if Wakatoshi decides to punish him for real. That’s an unspoken rule that when Koushi does something exceptionally rude on purpose, not just in the heat of the moment, Wakatoshi may take disciplinary action. Koushi’s slip-ups fall in that category.

Another punishment would be too much for Koushi today though. That’s why Wakatoshi steels himself, shushes his bonded with a kiss on his forehead and commands in an even tone:

“You’ll go to the bathroom now, prepare for your sleep, and I’ll bring you milk and cookies when you’re in your pyjamas under the covers.”

Koushi relaxes and gives a tiny nod. He throws his arms around Wakatoshi’s neck and hugs him, rubbing his head on Wakatoshi’s shoulder. Wakatoshi loves it when Koushi gets so cuddly. He lets his bonded embrace him for a while, then pries his hands away, reminding:

“And if I have the smallest suspicion that you’ve touched yourself while you’ve been in the shower, you’ll be in big, big trouble, baby boy.”

Koushi shivers. Unbelievable, but it seems he’s finally had enough trouble for today. Hopefully, the endured session will let him sleep calmly.

 

When Koushi is in the bathroom (they can hear him singing in the shower through the door), Satori comes closer to Wakatoshi and asks timidly: “May I hug you?”

“Of course,” answers Wakatoshi, and the next second Satori clings to him for dear life.

Wakatoshi starts worrying instantly, all his arousal forgotten, but Satori doesn’t let him fret.

“I’m just lonely,” he says, “And tired, I guess.”

Satori heaves a long pitiful sigh and continues:

“When I look at you and Koushi, I feel so envious. The two of you are so in love. I know it’s been hard in the beginning, but you’ve nailed it. You’ve even managed to include me and _Daichi_ in your life despite all the… nuances.”

Satori chuckles humourlessly, makes his last attempt at constricting his best friend with his long arms and lets Wakatoshi go. The tall ginger looks worn out. Did he have to put on a mask for Koushi and Wakatoshi’s sake? Or did he play with them to distract himself for a while? Wakatoshi knows that Satori participates on his own volition, but he can’t help but feel selfish for dragging his tired friend into his weird sex life.

They stand face to face, staring at each other, Wakatoshi desperately trying to think of what to say to disperse this heavy mood. He comes up with a dumb joke, hinting at Koushi's past crush on Daichi:

“At least I’m sure my best friend is not in love with me. That’d make things problematic.”

It’s lame. It’s so lame that Satori can’t resist and chastise him wryly:

“Oh, Ushi, you’re lucky your line of work doesn’t require a sense of humour. You'd be a remarkably incapable worker if this was the case.”

But the redhead smiles now. Even if his smile is ironic and barely there, it suits him much, much better than an expressionless face.

 

Later, they all sit on the bed and munch cookies of Wakatoshi’s production. Koushi fidgets, clearly uncomfortable sitting on his sore bottom, but refuses to change his position. Despite his denied orgasm, Koushi looks happy and calm. He falls asleep with the lights still on and a piece of cookie on his pillow.

After putting the silver-haired man to bed properly, Wakatoshi and Satori retreat to the living room.

While Satori pulls out Koushi’s old sleeping bag (the redhead claims that he adores sleeping on the floor) and gets comfortable, Wakatoshi sits on the carpet next to him waiting to wish his best friend good night. Satori crawls into the bag and turns his back to Wakatoshi.

“Thank you,” whispers Satori.

“You’re welcome,” answers Wakatoshi politely.

“You’re no fun, big man, always so respectful,” huffs Satori. His cheerfulness is fake, though, all traces of his improved mood gone.

“You’ll bond too,” assures him Wakatoshi.

“Yeah?” And what if I fall in love before that, like Koushi did? What if I bond to a person I won’t be able to live with? What if I actually don’t bond and die alone? What if…?” Wakatoshi effectively shuts Satori up, putting a palm on his friend’s big mouth.

“You’ll be fine. It’ll work out. If not, you can always come live with us. The sleeping bag is not going anywhere,” says Wakatoshi. He’s told it for a thousand times this month and will repeat as many times as necessary.

“I’ll buy me a new one, if I decide to move in. A prettier one,” decides Satori. It pacifies the red-haired man for now and Wakatoshi is able to go back to his bedroom when Satori’s breath evens out and he’s sure that his friend won’t awaken any time soon.

To his surprise, Koushi stirs at his silent arrival and slurs:

“Has these stupid thoughts again, our weirdo?”

Wakatoshi hums in confirmation.

“It’s good he has you,” mutters Koushi and snores away the next second.

Wakatoshi lies down next to him and falls asleep to the thought of how good it is _for him_ to have both Satori and Koushi in his life.

 

No matter where it all has come from, but Satori’s sulking only gets worse with time.

Koushi and Wakatoshi soon have no more ideas how to brighten Satori’s mood or change his train of thoughts.

Satori’s state of mind grows heavier and heavier for the next months until all he can do in his free time is lie on the floor of Koushi and Wakatoshi’s living room and sigh. His heavy sighs break his friends’ hearts. Needless to say, that their games together have come to an end.

Not to put too fine a point on it, Wakatoshi and Koushi’s sexy times together have become a rather infrequent occurrence in light of their friend’s unhappiness.

 

The gloomy times end suddenly and very Satori-style.

Satori calls Wakatoshi at 2 a.m. shouting in the receiver something barely intelligible. Wakatoshi squints at his comm in the darkness of his bedroom, trying to come back from his sleep enough to decipher what his restless friend is trying to say. He puts it on speaker, hoping that his bonded who’s awake all the same now may have a clue.

The listen uselessly for another minute or so. It doesn’t get better. At least Satori doesn’t sound hurt.

In the end, Koushi takes the initiative and uses his boss-voice (even Wakatoshi shudders a little inwardly when Koushi does that) to make Satori talk normally. It works. The redhead slows his lilted chanting enough to explain:

“Guys. Guys. **I’m bonded now!!!** It’s him! And he’s cute. Very grumpy and hates me already. I think I’m in love!”

As expected, by the finish of the last sentence Satori is back to yelling.

“What’s the fortuneless man’s name?” tries Koushi.

“Eita! Semi Eita! Ah, it’s the most beautiful name in the universe!”

Then they hear an unknown male voice roaring in the background something like: “Why can’t I even hit you, you red-headed idiot!”, followed by sounds of shuffling and fussing. The call ends.

Wakatoshi has the urge to call back but Koushi forcefully makes his bonded lie down and settles on him like an oversized koala, just in case.

“He’ll be fine, Wakatoshi, Satori can make it. Sleep,” whispers Koushi in half-slumber.

Wakatoshi doesn’t voice that it’s not Satori he is worried about, but this new boy. Satori’s fierce affection can frighten even the most courageous person sometimes.

Taking Koushi’s advice to heart, Wakatoshi reminds himself that tomorrow is a new day, and he will be able to deal with his now bonded best friend as is right and proper.

“We have a new family member now,” muses Wakatoshi inwardly. The thought brings a smile to his lips.

He has no doubts that everything will be fine.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thanks for reading!  
> Please, tell me what you think! I really hoped you liked the last chapter!
> 
> Are you interested in more of this world?
> 
> I'd be very glad to make new friends on Tumblr! [Maria-Falka](http://maria-falka.tumblr.com/)  
> Come yell at me if you want))

**Author's Note:**

> So, dear readers, have you liked it?  
> I would be glad to hear what you think about that strange world I've created.
> 
> Thanks for reading, and I'm happy when you leave comments!


End file.
